Summary
In this deeply personal episode, Jamie and Blake step away from interviews to reflect on one of the most important and tender questions they ask as therapists and friends: What’s the point in changing? Recorded during a 3% planning retreat, they share the raw stories of their own healing journeys—from addiction, numbness, and rage to freedom, connection, and hope. Whether you’re seeking freedom from a behavior or freedom for deeper relationships, this episode offers both encouragement and honesty for anyone in process.
Mentioned Resources
Chip Dodd’s Feelings Chart: https://www.chipdodd.com/free-resources-download
Jay Stringer’s book Unwanted: https://jay-stringer.com/book/
The Voice of the Heart by Chip Dodd: https://www.chipdodd.com/books
Takeaways
There’s often no clear “start” to change—just the next honest step.
External motivations (like a spouse or relationship) can be valid entry points.
Deep transformation comes when we realize we need to change for ourselves.
We are not our behaviors—shame grows when we enmesh identity with struggle.
Empathy often has to be relearned—and it starts with how we talk to ourselves.
Change is not linear, and recovery is a lifelong journey.
You're worth the work it takes to be known, healed, and free.
Chapters
(00:00) Welcome from the Cabin
(02:32) What Motivates Change?
(04:50) Motivational Interviewing & Counseling Insights
(06:44) Blake’s Story: Hitting a Wall
(10:10) Changing for a Relationship
(13:00) You Are Not the Problem
(16:20) Freedom From vs. Freedom For
(18:00) Jamie’s Story: Numbness and Rage
(22:10) The Role of Porn in Emotional Numbing
(24:55) Shifting Motivation Over Time
(26:20) Healing as Ongoing Work
(29:00) The Little Boy Inside Who Still Wants to Hide
(32:30) Parenting Yourself with Compassion
(35:10) Why Progress Feels Like a Circle
(37:00) Change for You, Not Just Them
(39:00) You’re Worth It
Keywords therapy, change, healing, recovery, shame, emotional health, addiction, porn recovery, motivation, empathy, rage, fatherhood, masculinity, self-awareness, spiritual formation, honesty, holistic masculinity, personal growth, identity, trauma, freedom, Jay Stringer, Chip Dodd, Voice of the Heart, emotional literacy
