* Disclaimer: Since our conversation, Gabriela's org has undergone some re-branding. You can now find her at APPstinence.org, rather than APPstinent.org.
Meet Gabriela - graduate student at Harvard and founder of an organization called APPstinence. This is what Gabriela has to say:
"I’ve always had two wolves inside when it comes to media consumption. On the one hand, my father’s experiences of the Vietnam War showed him the immense power of media messaging to manipulate and control, and as a result he kept a close eye on his kids and tech. On the other hand, I was born and raised in the Silicon Valley at a time when the world was so optimistic about the potential for social media to alleviate us of our loneliness. Soon, the two wolves came to a head.
Despite my father’s diligence, social media snaked its way in and I was hooked from a very young age. Realizing how complicated and strangely pressurized social media was making my life, I decided to try to cut back. Over 6 long years I navigated the stormy waters of getting offline. I repeated the error I see many make, which is to try and self-regulate, “find balance”, only to realize I was doing myself a disservice trying to fight products designed for my capture. I concluded that I had to walk away altogether if I wanted to find peace and stop “fighting.” I now do not have personal social media accounts (Instagram, Tik Tok, X, etc) and use a flip phone as my main phone. The peace of mind, clarity of thought, intimacy of relationships, and perspective this lifestyle has given has been far too good to keep to myself, and so I developed the life philosophy of “appstinence” so anyone can get in on it (check out or Mission and Philosophy page for more on what the concept entails). I made the 5D Method so anyone can try it.
I kickstarted Appstinence to show others that living without social media is not the distant utopian lifestyle it seems, and to crystalize my message to Gen Z (but is generalizable to all ages): The frustration you feel with you screen time isn’t your fault— you are not morally deficient because you can’t put your phone down. Fighting for “balanced use” isn’t worth the fight, not nearly. Walk away. Pick your battles. Just because we grew up on these platforms does not mean we have to continue depending on them for our social lives. We can choose differently. We can live fully without them.
