Questions Answered
1 Call - “Indian Wedding ideas?”
Ask: A traditional Indian wedding takes 3 days and involves hundreds of guests. This dear listener is planning one and she wants to know if we have any best practices for her.
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2 Email - “Indian bride and opinionated mom”
Ask: I wrote to you both earlier when my fiance and I had just gotten engaged about how to incorporate both of our cultures into our wedding weekend and I'm writing to let you know that we took your advice and are planning to have a few Indian elements in a generally western-styled wedding. We are having a sangeet the night before the wedding which will function like a welcome party where we will have Indian food and music. We are also getting married under a mandap and are planning to incorporate a few Hindu rituals into our ceremony, such as the septapadi (circles around the fire) and jai mala (garland exchange).
Do you have any advice on how to handle this situation? And/or how to make our large wedding feel like an intimate affair? One thing my fiance and I have discussed is writing our own vows, but I feel very awkward sharing such an emotional and intimate part of our relationship with a bunch of strangers.
3 Email “Fur babies at the wedding”
Ask: I don't want to bombard your social media outlets with questions, but have you two thought about doing a Quick Focus! or an episode on ways to incorporate your fur baby into the wedding (aka pet)? Our wedding is at a hotel so we cannot bring our sweet little pup but are thinking about naming our specialty drink after him. But I am sure there are some cool ideas/examples out there of how pets were incorporated into weddings.
4 Email “My family is a little bit racist”
Ask: I have a potential dilemma that you two seem perfectly suited to help with given your sensitivity to LGBTQ couples (although my fiance and I are in a heterosexual relationship) and cultural groups, so I'm hoping you can help me out.
Some of the members of my family are very conservative and half of my family was explicitly raised to be racist. My fiance is black and I'm white, so there are definitely some members of my family who will not approve of our marriage (or at best might consider him "one of the good ones"). The problem is that I'm not sure which family members are the ones who would be that way. It doesn't really come up at family get togethers, but I'm aware of it because of my mother's upbringing (my mom is great, accepting of all people, and supportive). I know that some members of the family have rejected this like she did, but I don't know for sure everyone's stances.
I won't allow anyone at my wedding to be mistreated because of their race, sexual orientation, or anything else, but is there something I can do in advance to prevent the possibility that won't be rude of me to those who don't deserve it?
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