Healing doesn’t move in straight lines. It’s whiplash moments of laughter that feel suspicious, anger that becomes fuel, diagnoses that shift as the language catches up, and the messy reality of carrying both good days and hard days at the same time.
In this episode of The Back Porch, I talk openly about what it’s like to live with CPTSD. I share how blasting music and cleaning become a survival tool, how my diagnosis shifted from Bipolar in my 20s to CPTSD today, and how my therapist reframed my patterns: fighting means I care, silence means I’m done. I also bring in Dr. Glenn Doyle’s reflection on suicidal ideation not as a desire to die, but as a signal that something in your world has to change.
With honesty and vulnerability, I unpack what it means to live in the messy middle to let joy and grief sit at the same table, to let anger become movement instead of shame, and to accept that two things can be true at the same time.
In this episode:
The whiplash of good days and why joy can feel suspicious
Anger as energy and why giving it an outlet is survival, not failure
The shifting landscape of mental health and moving from Bipolar to CPTSD
Patterns that tell the truth: fighting as care, silence as boundary
Naming suicidal thoughts as signals instead of shame
Learning that two things can be true at the same time
Psalms of a Daughter is now available on Amazon.
Grit & Grace Challenge is happening now on Patreon: patreon.com/jennifershatzer
Learn more: JenniferShatzer.com
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As always, with space and a little salty grace…
Until the next time the porch lights blink.
