Belonging is one of those things I did not realize I was starving for until I finally got a taste of it. You can be surrounded by people and still feel completely alone, or you can be with one person who really gets you and feel entirely at home. This episode is about that difference.
In “Finding Your Tribe,” I talk about how easy it is to confuse a crowd for community, especially when addiction or numbing out is part of the culture. I had bar buddies, party crowds, and familiar faces everywhere, but being surrounded is not the same as being seen. Some of those connections were not friendships; they were shared escape routes. Any time I tried to pull back, the pressure came fast, and it became clear they did not want to see me climb out.
I also get into the harder side of this topic: the one-way friendships, the guilt, and the family dynamics where setting boundaries feels like betrayal. I had to pay attention to what my body was telling me. When certain people were close, my stress spiked and my sleep got worse. When I stepped back, my nervous system calmed down. That was not drama. That was information.
Then I zoom out into the psychology of belonging and why the people around us shape what feels normal. A circle can normalize heavy drinking, constant complaining, or staying stuck. A healthier circle can normalize therapy, recovery, creativity, growth, and taking action. It is not about being above anyone. It is about awareness and direction.
If you feel “in between” right now, the old crowd does not fit but the new people have not fully shown up yet, you are not broken. You might be in a rebuild phase. This episode is for that gap.
Journal prompts:
After I spend time with certain people, do I feel lighter or heavier?
Where do I shrink, edit myself, or play a role to keep the peace?
Who supports my healing, and who only likes me when I stay stuck?
What small step can I take this week to move toward a healthy connection?
If you have been settling for noise because it feels better than being alone, I get it. But I also know this: peace is not loneliness, and a real tribe will never require you to destroy yourself just to belong.
No One Is Normal Book and Podcast Links:
🎧 Podcast Episodes: https://www.bradhhill.com/podcast
📘 Get the Book (Amazon): https://a.co/d/ibq85NR
