FIRST: It's Pina Colada Day! Here's a recipe we love, rum optional. And the summer heat is in FULL EFFECT here in Florida, so thank God for a refreshing beverage!
Now, on to the often tough business of saying NO.
Our YES can often be fear-based. Maybe we're afraid of disappointing others. Maybe we worry about what others will think of us if we don't do what they're asking. Maybe our self-esteem will take a hit if we veer off from our usual mode of people-pleasing.
If you say yes when you mean no, you are opening the door for resentment.
If you say yes when you mean no, you lose the ability to say yes to things you might have prioritized more.
“No” feeds into good boundaries, makes for healthier relationships, makes it so that your word is more authentic, more honest, you are more trustworthy. It means you know yourself and your priorities. Being able to say no when you mean it and need to shows that you also value yourself. You matter too!
Some steps to get into the habit of saying NO when that's what you really want to say:
1. Start by saying NO in your daily life in the smaller less significant situations to gain the muscle of saying no.
2. Observe how people you respect say no. Model what you say using their style.
3. Practice saying no to people you feel comfortable with.
4. Every time you say ‘no’ successfully, celebrate the win.
Action step: Take some time to think about what might make NO hard for you to say. Start practicing.
Need even more encouragement to move toward a NO? Get 14 Days of Courage at www.thecostiscourage.com
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