John 1
Many readers of today’s gospel have been puzzled. What does Jesus mean by “I saw you under the fig tree before Philip called you”? Does “the fig tree” have an underlying meaning? And how could Nathaniel jump to the conclusion, “You are the Son of God! You are the King of Israel!” just because Jesus saw him under the fig tree?
We don’t have clear answers to these questions. But we can safely assume that having been able to see Nathaniel under the fig tree was far beyond the power of an ordinary man. That’s why Nathaniel declared Jesus was the Son of God. This power of sight was not of natural human eyes. It was supernatural and divine. With his divine power, Jesus saw things in Nathaniel that are invisible to human eyes. And that was enough for Nathaniel to have faith in Jesus. Now, Jesus promised him to show more wonders to make his faith stronger.
Before we explain ourselves or excuse ourselves, Jesus pierces our hearts. He knows our secret intentions and desires. It is of no use to pretend before him. It is a laughable mistake to hide anything before his eyes. We may deceive even our own conscience, but not Jesus. Jesus had already pierced Nathaniel’s spirit and declared when Nathaniel was coming toward him for the first time, “Here is truly an Israelite in whom there is no deceit!”
I think the first step of any good prayer should be telling Jesus what is in my heart. I need to disclose all and everything in my heart to him – even what is sinful. When I struggle with sinful desires, my prayer should begin with admitting these desires – what I feel now and how I struggle now.
Perhaps the fig tree was the deepest place of Nathaniel’s spirit. When Nathaniel realized this Jesus could reach that place in his spirit, he also realized he was encountering his Lord and overjoyed. I pray that with honesty and humility I may encounter my Jesus at the most secret place of my soul so that I may also be filled with joy and praise.
