Although the poem I shared [“Homework” by Jane Yolen] is about avoiding homework, these days for many people ALL work is homework and we may find ourselves putting off tasks on our to-do lists, habits, and goals. Some places are again open for business, and some people don’t have the luxury to quarantine due to their profession, but lots are working, teaching, and learning from home, in many cases with their families as well. This is a challenging time for productivity, so please be gentle with yourself and take baby steps towards improving your state and getting what you need done.
I notice that some things I may delay because of some unsavory interaction which I dread. This indicates to me that a boundary may be needed for my self-care. Sometimes we can’t avoid entirely, but we can minimize their impact by approaching it mindfully, perhaps outsourcing or delegating the task.
Other things I avoid due to the fear of momentary unpleasantness that ultimately leads to an improved state, such as yoga poses I know will help with certain complaints or challenges I face. Take the Camel Pose backbend, which I hate and avoid, but may just be the medicine I need!
We need to distinguish between making a good choice to enforce healthy boundaries and take care of our needs, and avoiding or procrastinating on our highest priorities and path of transformation. Respecting our limits and understanding what we need allows us to make an empowered choice. But resistance can also sometimes be a barometer of fear. If so, what’s the fear?
In week 9 of Julia Cameron’s 12-week creative recovery program The Artist’s Way, she explains what is behind our inability to begin certain activities: “Do not call the inability to start laziness. Call it fear. [...] There is only one cure for fear. That cure is love.” and“In order to work freely on a project, an artist must be at least functionally free of resentment (anger) and resistance (fear). What do we mean by that? We mean that any buried barriers must be aired before the work can proceed. The same holds true for any buried payoffs to not working.”
She suggests a specific process for identifying and clearing away these “buried barriers” and it resembles processes I use in ontological coaching to break through challenges and bring myself and clients back into action.
Notice in your yoga and dance practices what it is that you readily exercise and are eager to jump right into, and what you resist or avoid. Distinguish what is a healthy boundary and what is avoidance due to resistance or fear. Then make a choice and empower your choice!
Welcome “back-to-school,” whatever stage of life you may find yourself in, and here’s to your ongoing learning, achievement, and satisfaction!
For more information about my classes and videos about ballet technique, dance, yoga, and coaching, please visit my website at ablythecoach.com
