If you're like most dudes, no one taught you how to be a man. Instead, you've probably been taught pretty much the opposite. So many personal influences in our lives: our parents, our peers, and society has conditioned us to be obedient rather than strong. We've been taught to be a good boy, follow the rules, not be rude and these ideas have been forcibly injected in our heads since we were able to speak. The problem is it doesn't work and is hardly ever in our best interests. These messages manipulate us into being manageable and compliant, the standards of systems that are about control. Sometimes giving is not right. Sometimes sacrificing is wrong. Sometimes being nice damages us. Today we're going to discuss the book No more Mr. Nice guy by Robert Glover.
Questions answered on this episode:
1. What's wrong with being a nice guy?
2. What does it mean to be integrated?
3. What's the making of a Nice Guy?
4. How do you please the person who matters the most?
5. How do you prioritize your needs?
What ways we can do to be integrated?
Be honest about your feelings, your interactions.
Quit being afraid of new experiences or what's around you.
Learn to surrender what you can't change.
Do what you want to do.
Learn how to get help.
Recognize that people are human.
Stop trying to be perfect.
Stop seeking approval.
Take care of your own needs with integrity.
Stop building such huge walls and let people in.
Don't try to cover up or take attention away from your weaknesses. Don't be afraid of your shortcomings.
Be aware or cognizant of your childhood events and some of the conditions or influences that led you to where you're at today.
Set boundaries.
Be transparent about what you're feeling about things.
Spend more time with men.
Recognize that women, they reject nice guys.
Learn to be more passionate, more assertive, more responsible.
Recognize that you don't have to do everything right, or you're allowed to be flawed.
Don't let the fear of failure or the fear of success.
Go after the life you want, quit settling.
Make your own rules.
