When you were a kid did you play the game or refuse because you might lose? The fear of losing was too big for me when I was young. I have to forgive my younger self. The younger-me didn’t have the support needed to handle the fear. I didn’t have someone standing there to tell me everyone is afraid and being brave is to go ahead and still play. You can’t be brave without fear.
My favorite verse in the Bible is “I believe. Help my unbelief.” Mark 9:24. The verse helps me realize I can hold both faith and doubt. I can be brave and afraid at the same time. The key is to sense the fear, see it as a signal, and act. I am not an expert, but I have lived this out in business and sales for many years. I’ve experienced it first-hand.
If I am afraid, I use it like an alarm, a trigger to say I must act. Now I know what I must do. I must do that which I am afraid to do. I’m not talking about jumping off tall buildings. I’m talking about the practical work of reaching out and offering help. I’m talking about sales.
Here’s the hard part. Fear doesn’t seem to go away. I have grown in my faith that I can act, but I’m still afraid to pick up the phone or walk into the building. I still worry. Now I fortify my chances with preparation. I respect the people I’m going to contact and do a little homework to get an idea of how I can help. I don’t want to waste their time. I have a good idea I can help, or I don’t try. Maybe if I was a little braver, I’d have a bigger imagination about who I can help.
I read a story once about an attorney who had never lost a case. I think his name is Gerry Spencer. I remember he said it wasn’t that hard because he only took cases he knew he could win. I’m guessing there was a little forced humility, but I got the idea. He was afraid of losing.
One of the things I love about sales is the purity of the challenge and the fear. Few occupations have day to day fear that you can confront and learn about yourself. Some people grow cold or hard and start to treat people poorly. I had an old car manager who was divorced three times and addicted to cocaine tell me if I worked hard I could be just like him. I didn’t sell cars much longer after that.
Recently, I have had a rough few days, and it has been very good for me. I let myself believe I shouldn’t be afraid at this age, with this experience, with this training. I’m supposed to know what I am doing. I teach this for a living. I’ve been wrestling with the fear almost like a laboratory experiment. I didn’t realize why the fear was so strong or where it was coming from.
And then I listened to my favorite podcast, Finding Mastery by Michael Gervais. You should skip my podcast and listen to his. So many great episodes, and today was with Tony Blauer about Knowing Fear. I’ve heard that when the student is ready the teacher appears. Well, I was ready, and I am learning.
