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“I want to be a millionaire.” “I want to get all A’s this semester,” “I want to lose ten pounds.” We love to set goals for ourselves, dreaming of what life would be like if we just accomplished that next thing. I’m a “big goal” kind of person – things that seem out of reach motivate me to push forward and achieve, and I don’t mind working towards something for a long time.

The problem is that most of our goals aren’t any good. In fact they may even be sabotaging our lives...