"hope and fear come from a feeling that we lack something; they come from a sense of poverty. We can't simply relax with ourselves. We hold on to hope, and hope robs us of the present moment... [but] maybe the only enemy is that we don't like the way reality is now and therefore wish it would go away fast. But what we find as practitioners is that nothing ever goes away until it has taught us what we need to know" (Chodron, When Things Fall Apart).
We as people love security, we love knowing whats going on. The uncertainty of life, and the inevitable impermanence (death) leads us to make choices, seek pleasure, and distract ourselves with busy chores in the hopes that we have control over our own situation. However, we're cheating ourselves by doing this. We're not facing our greatest fears and allowing our fears to be acknowledge and politely put down.
The pain that we endure is not something everyone readily welcomes into their life. It's an unpleasant feeling that brings with it, jitters, anxiety, and a need to quickly fill in the hole that the pain has left. We don't allow ourselves anytime to analyze what we're going through, and why we're reacting in the way that we are, instead we just rush through this pain. But something, we should all be aware of is the idea that these loss's are actually lessons.