Communication is one of these power skills that people talk about quite a bit especially when it comes to employment or even when it comes to education and the learning process I kind of boiled down at communication to to kind of components. One is about understanding it's just about information and exchanging information and the others about persuasion so trying to influence another person's thoughts behaviors and and that sort of thing.
And I don't think persuasion in this context is kind. Of a bad word. I think a lot of the communication we do in life is meant to be persuasive. We try to persuade children to act a certain way. I try to persuade my students to do certain things. We try to persuade each other as you know, partners and friends and coworkers to think different ways or to act in different ways.
And I think persuasion is a very important method or important way of communicating. But I want to point out that there are some really ineffective. I guess law. Term ineffective ways of communicating They may be commute maybe effective in the short term, but then long term to kind of influence another person's behavior they tend to be very ineffective.
So things like withdrawal and that's really the kind of the illumination of the possibility to communicate. So if you're withdrawing from a conversation, if you're withdrawing from a dialogue that can really influence another person's behavior can cause them to try to okay, well what needs do you have that?
I can meet but it tends to be only temporary until that with the draw. It without withdrawal is no longer there until the person reenters a conversation then the behavior tends to revert to what it was. Aggression is the same sort of thing so you can be very aggressive in your communication and that might influence somebody for a very short period of time, but then once that aggressiveness kind of dies down then people tend to go back and they revert to their other behaviors and then the last one is just guilt.
So giving people guilt trips can be really effective in the short term and long-term it can be really really ineffective. So we're talking about communication and trying to effectively exchange knowledge and persuade people to change their ways change their behaviors or change their ways of thinking. One of the ways of communication that I've most recently been both experimenting with and exposed to things to one of my dear friends and colleagues is a form of communication called non-violent communication.
And it's really just a framework more or less a structure for how we communicate to each other in a way that is not aggressive not. Trying to withdraw into yourself and not trying to make another person feel guilty. It's a form of communication that provokes and instills empathy which is one of the key drivers for understanding each other's perspectives in the world and for engaging a person in what kinds of activities we want them to to be involved in order to want them to do.
I want them to act upon. So the non-American communication framework not my idea. It's a great book if you just Google non-violent communication fantastic book. It'll give you a really good structure for it or really good way of understanding it. But the short version here is just to start with an expression an observation of what you see or what you observe in a way that's non-judgmental so it's telling another person well.
I see you've done this or I understand what you've done here. I try to express very concretely what it is that you've done from a very. Objective point of view without making a subjective judgment about what they've done. Then move from the observation into an expression of your feelings.
