“If you want to have a conversation with me about who I am, don't just talk to me about my failures. Don't just talk to me about my bottom moments. My story is in my “keep going.” In the times where I was not doing the greatest, but I kept going.” - Karega Bailey
What an empowering statement! We often forget that we are more than just the sum of our experiences, and we have the power to shape our own identities and narratives.
This episode serves as a reminder that we can choose to learn from our struggles, grow from them, and use them as opportunities for personal development and growth.
WHAT TO LISTEN FOR
What does it mean to be in a “bottom moment” [3:54]
Those time when you “didn’t get it right”, impacting you and people you care about
When things aren’t in your control (but don’t necessarily define who you are)
When you’re in the lowest part of your life (e.g. substance abuse, losing a loved one, etc.)
The dangers of centering our identity on our bottom moments [9:09]
Self-sabotaging yourself to believing that “the real you” is the you when you’re in the lowest
Having the emotional weight of doing something that is not in alignment with your values
Missing opportunities for growth
Failure to give grace to yourself, which often results in failure to give grace to others
The haze of pulling yourself out of those bottom moments [15:57]
Getting over the desire to want to feel good all the time could be a challenge as you attempt to rise up
Remembering that life is a balance of highs and lows could be hard sometimes
Being mindful of how you talk to yourself
Finding practical ways to be good to yourself
Navigating the haze [26:40]
Discovering tools that will push you to be less hard on yourself (movement, therapy, meditations, applications, etc.)
Setting boundaries to people who continue to hold you hostage of your bottom moments
Reminding the people close to you that you are human and your mistakes don’t define you
Lessons on bottom moments [36:39]
Your bottom moments are also the best moments to learn and grow
Your bottom moments are also beginnings
RESOURCES FROM THIS EPISODE
Listen to I Am Light by India.Arie
TO STAY CONNECTED:
Spotify Playlist - Music for this moment.
Follow @iamshate on Instagram
Follow @scotthayes_lcsw on Instagram
If you'd like either of us to join your next panel or event, please email us at thelovehaze@gmail.com.
