This is a very contemplative episode. Alan starts off the episode sharing thoughts about stillness. Bre talks about what arises when she slows down and then being able to move with the flow of life. Alan discusses the power of habit and how that can also help add to creation- ideas, writing, etc. They dive right into boundaries. Bre asks Alan what boundaries mean to him and why does he have to set boundaries? Boundaries aren’t static. Like a tree: roots are important but being able to move with the wind is important. Bre has been questioning the idea of boundaries or perhaps just has a new perspective on it. Boundaries are based on the external versus honoring your true or highest self.
They dive into the idea of giving. Everything from giving just to give and not giving to receive. When you give too much that can drain your cup. Reciprocation is important- Alan points out that nobody is self made AND nobody is coming to save you. Bre challenges the idea saying that when you give with expectations is when your cup gets drained instead of just when you give to give. Touching on self care or filling your own cup and how often people find excuses to tend to others; Alan expands on the idea of martyrdom in those excuses of putting self behind others.
So much of this comes from unconscious patterning that was formed as a young child. At some point we forget our worthiness or wholeness and then we seek to fill that outside of ourselves.
They are saying similar perspectives but it comes down to linguistics. Bre feels boundaries create a false sense of control and then when they are broken, we beat ourselves up about it instead of just flowing with what is. Try on different ideas of boundaries to see what feels right to you.
Alan loves the little messages in Pixar movies. He references Monsters- they shift from scaring children to get energy to power their world to making them laugh and realize that laughter is more powerful! He talks about how we put up walls out of fear. Walls don’t let fear and pain but also doesn’t allow the joy, love, either. He emphasizes the importance of being open. You can’t have the past determine your future.
They both talk about the heart center and keeping your heart open! Unconditional love... yes, that means, no conditions, just straight love for yourself and others. Alan shares the quote:
JOURNAL PROMPT: Maybe today is not a journal… it’s reaching out to a friend you haven’t talked to, a thought, something you can share with your spouse.
HUGE THANK YOU to the Allyson Band https://allysonband.com/ for the podcast’s music and Brianna Cote http://briannacote.com for photography and cover design.
