Naming the Emotion is a skill we use when someone else is upset. It quiets the emotion and builds trust. The principles underneath why this skill works and why it's important are found in research. Let's explore some research-based principles. Reflective listening changes a person's feelings and ideas in a problem-solving, insight-producing, tension-releasing, responsibility-building, conflict-reducing way. Need to be heard and understood can be measured in the brain. Being understood is rewarding and socially connecting. Not being understood lights up the parts of the brain where negative emotion, social pain, and thinking of how different you are from others is experienced. Having more emotion words (emotional granularity) helps you be less reactive and have more ideas for how to cope so you can solve the problem that caused the emotion in the first place. Interoception (sensing emotions and other things going on inside our own bodies) is the first step in how we create emotions and second step is giving that bodily sensation or emotion a name. These principles support and explain why reflective listening and naming the emotion are such powerful tiny superpowers.
