After a few hours of driving Cameron decided to go take a nap in the back of the Winnebago and let John drive. Memphis was still riding shotgun. His eyes half open, Memphis was slipping in and out of sleep and muttering “How did he survive that tornado with a belt? It doesn’t make sense.”
“Hey Raines. Wake up.” John said loudly.
Memphis snapped awake. “What’s up?” he said, yawning.
“I was thinking...what if we didn’t go to Tallahassee?” John said, his eyes not leaving the road in front of him.
“What? But that’s where Scott is?” Memphis replied.
“Yeah but what if he’s not there? What if he moved? What if he’s in...oh I don’t know...LAS VEGAS NOW. What if we went there, huh? Wouldn’t that be fun?” John said, getting noticeably more excited.
John turned to face his passenger and Memphis recoiled in horror as he noticed his eyes. John’s pupils had been replaced with dollar signs.
“What the fuck? How is that possible? Can you even see anything right now?” Memphis said, his eyes flicking towards the glovebox where he knew he had stashed a can of bear mace.
“What if I CAN see, Memphis? WHAT IF I CAN?!” John was shouting now. His eyes had turned back to the road but the green glow from the dollar signs reflected off of the windshield. “WHAT IF I CAN SEE EVERYTHING? THE CHIPS? THE CARDS? THE PISSED STAIN SEATS? WHAT IF TOOK THIS EXIT? WHAT IF I LEFT I-NIIIIINE?”
John’s screaming was replaced by the yarling of one Scott Stapp belting out “What if.” Cameron bolted upright and awake. The Winnebago was quiet. John and Memphis seemed to be discussing lunch up front.
“The fuck just happend?” Cameron croaked, eyes squinting and mouth slightly agape.
“Dude, you fell asleep. I guess you had a nightmare or something.” Memphis said, turning to look at Cameron. “We’re thinking of stop--WHOA why is your dick hard?”
Was Cameron’s dream prophetic? Is the boys’ quest doomed from the start? Will they make it to Tallahassee? Stay tuned.
Highlights include: Scott’s childhood was basically the movie Frailty; Norah Jones? Really?; Woodstock and Two Smoking Barrels; Money for water and the shits for free; Even Worse Album Fart; Scream Creed; Zach Braffin it; That guy from the Office; Who the fuck likes Heath bars?; You crossed a line, Daughtry; Fifty-three Times; Scott’s a tough guy; School Daze
