Work. Not enough data through over the weekend for us to be able to run the shifts we’d rostered for this week. Very annoying. Hate cancelling shifts. Suuucks. I was talking with my work wife about my idea of a working holiday and I heard myself giving a fairly good reason for taking a trip that I hadn’t thought of until I’d said it out loud. Basically, the break-up with Sophie is something I still kind of time things back to in my mind, as a lifeline landmark in time. The beginning of Covid is another big marker that I measure time to as well, but the Sophie break up and resultant emotional calamity is something I feel more. And I was saying that it would be good to have an experience that I could use as as full-stop to the hangover from that break-up. Or to replace that landmark as the last landmark that I hark back to in my mind. I’ve never been good with dates and times or having a sense of when events were - sometimes when I’m trying to work out when something happened, I’ll plot it against where I was living, whether Sai and I had gone on our trip yet, Hawthorn winning the grand final in 2008. I think that for quite a few years in the Sophie relationship I was trapped in debt and unhappy in the apartment there, but trapped because I wanted to fix the splashback before I could even try to move out, but I was drunk all the time because I was too poor to do the repair, and it became a circle that kept me trapped - and that all led to just such a long time being spent with time zooming by and me not marking the time or having any experiences to punctuate the time. Since I think recovering from the worst of the break up, I have a better sense of time now and feel it more when it’s getting too monotonous. A trip and an experience now would be great, because I’d be grateful for it in real time as marker of time and or the end of that hangover period. Anyway - getting repetitive now. Guess it’s hard to explain. Went for a swim. Bit windy, but nice and green. Mum popped up to the beach for her fourth swim of the day. I rode to town and got Mexican. Pretty good. Got my first issue of Hello! in many years. Royal issue. Did a little gardening. Would like to get two square units of lavender and of rosemary growing in this little patch next to the garage. Worked for a while on getting a Twitter bot working. No joy yet and need to adjourn for the evening now. Damn - not tired. M: 7. E: 7. 😐😓😀🤩
