In this solo episode, host Janeen reviews some recent articles about friendship, offering stark counterpoints to what she says they're getting wrong about making friends. They make it sound easy to just "be vulnerable" with each other, or to simply join a group, or to ask someone for their number. These tasks are monumental for some of us. Janeen argues that a lot of the conversation about friendship today assumes people are all well-adjusted, functioning individuals that are free from pain, trauma and mental health difficulties. When in reality, we humans carry a ton of pain and trauma with us, and that we are fundamentally affected by past hurts as well as by a wide range of personality quirks. "We're all weird!" she proclaims. This can make it really hard to find and keep good friends, and nearly impossible to "just be vulnerable" with one another. From feelings of inadequacy to jealousy and competitiveness, all the way to coping with severe mental health challenges, Janeen suggests most people have the ability to become self-actualized but that, even still, we can forget that others are suffering. And that means we're failing to appreciate one another for our "majestically beautiful" flaws. She goes further to state that we humans are sacred beings, created from stardust, and that if we were to honor each other's human pain more often, and approach potential friends as the sacred beings they truly are, each of us would be able to communicate and build connections much more easily. Join Janeen for a rare glimpse at one of her philosophical diatribes! Learn more on vulnerability, friendship blocks and humans as sacred beings at https://women-friends.com/blog. Want to be featured on Women Friends? Share a friendship story with Janeen for an upcoming show by leaving a voice memo here!
References:
https://www.wbur.org/hereandnow/2021/10/13/adults-making-new-friends
https://tobemagnetic.com/expanded-podcast/2021/172
Anne Lamott's "Small Victories: Spotting Improbable Moments of Grace"
https://www.npr.org/podcasts/510307/invisibilia
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