This week, we chug along the tracks at breakneck speeds in the company of Mr. Boom Boom Chubby Choo Choo as we take a look at Under Siege 2: Dark Territory; the locomotive sequel of a nautical Die Hard ripoff. For pure entertainment value, and the villains alone, this is worth watching. Steven Seagal’s performance, on the other hand, meh…
Let’s get into it, shall we!
Tall and tubby trooper takes teen on a train taken by terrorists trying to total targets until the tremendous tactician takes the task to topple terrorism! Beach babe’s boobs get binoculared by bureaucrats! The Dark Territory tagline tally! Flames in the fireless firmament! “Everything but the n-word” antagonist! Teddy bears every six seconds! Captains co-fucking in the cab of a choo-choo! Seinfeld scenery driving! Kahlúa ka-blooah! Gratuitous Seagal insertions, and much, much more on this week’s episode of The Worst Movie Ever Made!
