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welcome back! we have tasked ourselves with writing in our journals for about a month and we decided to dive deeper into our journal entries and our deepest thoughts! listen to hear more :) follow us on twitter @steps_podcast

Hailey's entries:

coughing at work is dehumanizing i feel like an animal in a jungle sometimes i just want to be mysterious and grungey and then i cough at work or school and i’m just normal average and i feel like a zoom animal come to the exhibit and watch the stupid girl cough!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

i literally almost choked to death at work because i was so afraid to cough i have a W.A.M wet ass mouth :(

colorism the beauty standard and being hit on at the gym i’ve never experienced that it’s kind of sad is that normal am i just awkward

“tall girls always lose”

fatphobia

“you can’t be fat ugly dumb and poor or something” that’s so messed up

sometimes i yearn for sexism and misogyny tbh

i once heard think back to the time you were cat called the most you were probably underage weren’t you and WOAH yeah that’s true probably

what is the motivation behind going on a reality tv show if not money or clout would you want your real love story displayed on national television i feel like the only show not included in this is love is blind why is love is blinds premise superior

transition to eleven

routine ignorance follow the leader

how many things am i doing just because my parents did them

how do you break a habit

today i saw a tiktok talking about how nicki minaj is probably on the spectrum and putting up video clips showing her stemming etc. i just think it’s so harmful when can neurodiversity just be accepted and not have to be acknowledged i just didn’t like how the clips were out together i have a lot of characteristics of those on the spectrum and i wish they could all just be normalized like it’s okay to get sensory overload or have to have your spaces a certain way and follow a certain schedule and none of those traits necessarily mean you are on the spectrum and who cares if you are!!!

boundaries are so hard

people pleasing is so hard to maintain

perfectionism is the devil

trying to perfect or balance or healthy include these things in my life is my personal hell the good place really made me change my perspective and i feel like at any angle any person looks at their lives they could see it as their personal hell that show made me think a lot tbh

stockholm syndrome is so freaking crazy but i get it i’m always drawn to and towards the things and people that have caused me the most harm and hurt why can’t it be the other way around?

Halcyeon's entry excerpts:

I think using too much technology is bad for our minds. Like i do that really often which I don’t think is a good thing. I’ll be in the middle of doing something and completely forget what i was doing.

“I also think it is important to celebrate the small victories. So i need to take it one step at a time.”

I like writing like this though because when I just keep going I think it generally ends up being about something rather entertaining or interesting. It’s like a dive into my mind where I just reach in and see what I pull out.

“I am starting to realize that I need a lot of money lol. I know that sounds weird but what i mean when i say that is that right now, I have little financial responsibility but I also make little money and if my income doubled but I had sole financial responsibility for myself and my needs, i’d be super broke. So yah, i need lots of money. “