Let's hear from Prophetess Tammy Peak-Williams, Minister Latausha Cheatham, and myself, Co-Pastor RAM discussing how we overcame domestic violence from a relationship that we plan would last a lifetime forever, and we were willing to stay despite the abuse for our children because were persuaded and believed the lie the abuser told us.
What Is Domestic Abuse?
Domestic violence can be defined as a pattern of behavior in any relationship that is used to gain or maintain power and control over an intimate partner. Abuse can be mental, physical, sexual, emotional, financial, or psychological actions or threats toward another individual. Any behaviors that frighten, intimidate, terrorize, coercion, manipulate, hurt, humiliate, blame, injure, or wound someone. Domestic abuse can happen to anyone! It can occur within any relationship! Domestic violence is a desire to gain and maintain power and control over an intimate partner. The abuser exerts power and control over the victim.
Domestic violence doesn't have a face, race, or gender, and it can affect anyone regardless of age, sexual orientation, socioeconomic background, faith, and education level. Domestic abuse may culminate in serious physical injury or death.
Domestic violence isn't just physical; it's emotional, verbal, spiritual, financial, sexual, mental, social, and cultural.
Recognizing the signs of domestic abuse; does your partner…
Embarrass or make fun of you in front of your friends and family or their family and friends?
Put down your accomplishments?
Does your partner prevent you from going to work or try sabotaging your employment?
Is the relationship all about the other person and less about you?
Make you feel like you are unable to make decisions on your own?
Use intimidation or threats to gain compliance?
Tell you that you are nothing without them?
Mistreat you—grab, push, pinch, shove, or hit you in any way?
Call you several times a night or show up to ensure you are where you said you would be?
Use drugs or alcohol as an excuse for saying hurtful things or abusing you?
Blame you for how they feel or act?
Pressure you sexually?
Withhold financial support even if it's your money?
Make you feel like there is "no way out" of the relationship?
Prevent you from doing something you won't – like spending time with friends or family?
Try to keep you from leaving after a fight or go somewhere after a fight to "teach you a lesson"?
Questions: Do you...Sometimes feel scared of how your partner may behave?
Constantly make excuses to other people for your partner's behavior?
Believe that you can help your partner change if only you change something about yourself?
Try not to do anything that would cause conflict or anger your partner?
Always do what your partner wants you to instead of what you want?
Stay with your partner because you fear what your partner would do if you broke up?
Fear that your partner will take your child/children if you leave?
Feel alone and believe that no one understands you and that whatever happens to you is your fault?
Please speak with someone who will help you and not judge you, someone outside the family who doesn't know you or your partner, so their opinion isn't biased.
Without help, the abuse will continue. Making that first call to seek help is a bold, courageous step toward your freedom!Always remember...NO ONE deserves to be abused. The abuse is not your fault. YOU ARE NOT ALONE!!
Please call or text the Domestic Violence Hotline at 1.800.799.SAFE (7233) or Text "START" to 88788For more information, please visit the Domestic Violence website; https://www.thehotline.org/
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