A fantastic title that kicks us off with Patricia Morgan "Loving Them As They Are" as we dive into trauma and addictions.
Wisdom, right out of the gates, boundaries represent where I begin and end, and you begin and end—getting clear that our thoughts are different from one another, same with feelings and core values. More to come as you listen and we get through three key elements.
- Boundaries: You need to stay true to your values; to know what you're going to say yes - no - or it depends. It's not good for me to say "yes"; you must listen to get more great tips.
- Laugh at the absurdities. (These intrigue me.) I'm not talking about laughing at your loved one who is struggling. Life is a paradox. I'm talking about laughing at yourself, perhaps at your efforts to change someone other than yourself. Laugh at the absurdities that we think we control another human being.
- Blame the Addiction or Situation: Externalizing the problem eases the finger-pointing at the loved one who is strolling. An example is a line, Stolen by Addictions, in the subtitle of my book, Love Her As She Is. We are wired to fight, flight, and freeze. Self-reflection, getting centred, aligned and regulated before self-blame or blaming others. Find a supportive network.
We are getting equipped to handle the hard things in life with the ones we love—great resources at Patricia's website.
