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I always discuss how toxic marital scorekeeping is... but is there any way that it can actually improve your dynamic when done differently? Listen and learn, grasshoppers. Realize that you will be reframing your unhelpful beliefs and also, as usual, thinking deeply about their origin in your earlier life. Specifically, we will be exploring where your victim/perpetrator mentality comes from. This is basic CBT so if it works for you, therapy would likely work as well.
Related links:
Emotional Labor Is Not The Problem
Couples You Meet in Counseling #2: The Ice Queen and the Martyr
Beware Of The Person Who Is Always Being Mistreated By Exes
Would All People Respond To Your Partner The Way You Do?
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