This episode discusses the difference between cathexis and love as Lauren is coming to understand the terms as she reads ALL ABOUT LOVE: NEW VISIONS by bell hooks.
Trey opens by asking Lauren about a recent "work-cation." She shares how she chose to show up for herself as CEO, COO, and CFO and some difficult and scary choices she had to make. At the end of the day, it is her job alone to care for herself so that she can care for Sex Ed for You.
The conversation centers around the verb, "CATHECT: to invest with mental or emotional energy" and the noun, "CATHEXIS: investment of mental or emotional energy in a person, object, or idea." Trey and Lauren discuss the conflation of love and cathexis and how possibly Lauren's fundamental and religious understanding of "love" was shaped by cathexis.
Trey shares how things are bubbling up for him as he sorts through old patterns and behaviors and the affirmation that is making this process slightly less painful. Despite his best efforts, two recent instances of criticism bubbled up into Lauren's orbit. They share how they navigated through hurt feelings and came out on the other side intact!
They both push into the concept of many of their conflicts revolving around desiring to protect the other, but accidently inflicting harm, and sadly, how it can leave one partner feeling controlled.
Wanna feel some TENSION!?! Jump to minute 28:33! See Lauren and Trey rework through a conflict in real time that they thought they'd already solved.
Lauren briefly mentions Karpman's Drama Triangle and how at any point we can play the victim, the judge, or the rescuer. If you'd like to know more, book a free consult with Lauren today! https://sexedforyou.as.me/freeconsult Lauren would be honored to walk with you and your partner through conflicts of your own!
Books Mentioned:
ALL ABOUT LOVE: https://amzn.to/3q2xYtt
LEAVING THE FOLD: https://amzn.to/43if8g6
THINK AND GROW RICH: https://amzn.to/3MLeu5k
Reminder: This is not a "how to" podcast, but rather a "how they" podcast. Please listen to our opinions and then come to your own! Learn from our mistakes or give our techniques a try! It’s all up to you.
Looking to expand your own sexuality education in the new year? Check out Lauren's monthly membership program, HEMLOCK. At only $10 a month you'll have access to the tools you need to begin to reclaim your sexuality for yourself! https://sexedforyou.com/hemlock
Want to make your own podcast? We cannot recommend Spotify for Podcasters enough. Visit https://podcasters.spotify.com/ to launch your podcast today.
