In this edition of The Update Journal, I issue what can generously be described as a retraction regarding the St. George Ferry route—though in reality, it’s less an apology and more an admission that I simply did not read the schedule. At all. Turns out the boat does go where it says it goes… when you look. Meanwhile, it’s the final week before Christmas, which means every Target, Five Below, and vaguely festive retail space has been transformed into a real-life obstacle course. Everyone has collectively decided now is the time to shop, creating a citywide panic fueled by procrastination, blinking lights, and people blocking aisles while “just browsing.” And finally, we ask the most important question of the season: how much would the 12 Days of Christmas actually cost today? Spoiler alert: the answer involves inflation, regret, and the realization that true love may need a payment plan.
In the headlines on #TheUpdate this Monday, six teenagers were wounded in a mass shooting at a Brooklyn “Sweet 16” birthday bash– with a pair of gunmen still on the loose, according to police.
A weekend storm sent temperatures plunging well below zero in the Midwest and dumped heavy snow on parts of the Northeast, creating many airport delays and slick roads as the Pacific Northwest braced for more rain after days of flooding and mudslides.
And it was a day of crisis around the world:
