The Season of Thankfulness is upon us and I want to talk with you about a the concept of “Toxic Gratitude”.
Last Thanksgiving, I was strolling on the beach, and I was overcome with this incredible wave of gratitude. There are so so so many things to be grateful for and in that moment I was feeling all of them. After a few minutes, I started thinking about what I wanted for myself and my business in the coming year. Where I wanted to grow my business, how I wanted to live my life, how I wanted to show up. I could have let that shame cycle of "I already have so much; why do I want more when others have less?" take hold, but I didn’t.
I thought to myself: I’m incredibly grateful AND ALSO… I want more for my life.
So what is toxic gratitude, and what does it have to do with my epiphany on the beach that day? And why am I bringing this idea to you now?
Toxic gratitude is gratitude that is either shaming, manipulating or even in some cases: gaslighting. It is gratitude that is being used either on you or by you to manipulate behavior.
I caught this idea on a Mel Robbins podcast, and it really resonated with me. Here are three ways toxic gratitude can show up in your life:
The first is when you focus on gratitude and avoid the big mess in front of you.
Second is when this gratitude causes you to stay stuck, like in a loveless marriage or unfulfilling job.
Third, you put yourself down after an accomplishment by saying, "I'm just lucky, “I’m incredibly grateful that I was chosen for…”
Try this instead: say, "I'm grateful and also..." and then see what comes up. Perhaps nothing. Maybe you’re grateful, and that’s all. Awesome!
Or, if you immediately think about something after the ALSO, this is what you know you truly want in your core, and it could be what you are avoiding.
I am incredibly grateful for each and every one of you who has helped to build his powerful community. From the bottom of my heart, I thank you.
If you’re loving the podcast, you’ll love my Confidence Community even more! Tools and tactics anecdotes for the doers and the dreamers to help you speak up, stand out, and claim your seat at the table!
Happy Thanksgiving, Podsters!
CNBC Article
Mel Robbins Podcast on Toxic Gratitude
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=spsFmRYSKgg
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