How do you feel about the holidays that seem to be approaching so quickly? I spent years like a mixed bag of emotions-excited for the nostalgia and memories to be made-yet immediate exhaustion and angst would quickly approach when I would think about everything that 'needed' to be done. I said yes to every opportunity-striving and grasping for what I thought would make the holidays perfect. Yet I left myself and my own personal well being out of the equation. I was tired from showing up at gathering and parties that I only said yes to out of obligation, I was tired of feeling the pressure to make purchases for people that I barely knew, and I was exhausted from believing that in order to have a successful and magical holiday season everything has to be to the extreme.
Personal needs was a concept that I was unfamiliar with, yet it is one of the most basic and foundational aspects of our human experience. And that's what today's episode is all about-needs. I had needs of connection, to matter, to be seen and belonging-but how I was trying to fill those needs wasn't working. Now I approach the holidays with a different perspective. I choose to fill my own cup, ask for the support I need and prioritize what is essential and what might need to take a back seat. Understanding your needs (especially around the holiday season when stress and overwhelm is high) is an essential understanding to your personal joy.
Listen to Learn:
"What I want in my life is compassion, a flow between myself and others based on a mutual giving from the heart" ~Dr Marshall Rosenberg, Founder of Nonviolent Communication
"Our feelings and needs guide our behavior." ~Krista Resnick
"Human needs are universal." ~Krista Resnick
"Nonviolent communication allow us to connect with our own feelings and needs, and the feelings and needs of others. " ~Krista Resnick
"The invitation within non-violent communication is first connect with yourself so you understand your own feelings and needs before making requests of another." ~Krista Resnick
"When we blame, criticize, judge, or demean others, we're actually speaking violently. We are shutting down the rich connection and nourishment that we crave." ~Krista Resnick
"When you aren't feeling the way you want to feel, ask yourself-what might be your unmet need?" ~Krista Resnick
LINKS FROM THIS EPISODE
Episode #106: Dangerous Assumptions with Non-Violent Communication Trainer Kathy Ziola
Episode # 99: Non-Violent Communication with Marianne van Dijk
