Projection is a fascinating phenomenon. Since we are often unable to admit or identify our internal fears, the only way we can find them is to see them in others. We project our own perceived shortcomings onto others. When we judge others we are really judging ourselves.
The world is a giant mirror always reflecting back parts of ourselves. If a person or thing we interact with INFORMS us, we are safe with that trait. On the other hand, if it AFFECTS us, chances are we are a victim of our own projections. It's only when you fear an aspect of yourself that you'll get an emotional charge from someone else's behaviors.
If you look at your list of negative traits you dislike in others, pick one trait and ask yourself these questions:
· Have I ever demonstrated that behavior in the past?
· Am I demonstrating that behavior now?
· Under different circumstances am I capable of demonstrating that behavior?
So how do we shift from judging to healing?
Byron Katie an American author of the book “Loving What Is” created “The Work” which is a simple process of remaining alert to and questioning stressful thoughts.
The Work is a process that involves writing down troubling thoughts and then asking four questions: (1) Is it true? (2) Can I absolutely know it is true? (3) How do I react when I think that thought? (4) Who would I be without the thought?
And then the turnaround….(Find the worksheets and guidelines at www.thework.com)
She suggests that when we have an emotional reaction to someone or feel judgment and label a person’s behavior I could simply ask myself, “IS THAT TRUE?” Can I absolutely know that’s true? Or What would happen if it wasn’t true.
More importantly, Katie challenges us to ask “How do I react when I think that thought?” What is my self talk, what is my physical reaction?
And then she invites us to imagine who we would be without that thought. Taking responsibility for our response allows us to let go of excuses or blaming others, drop the pain of the past and harness the power to change our story.
Old patterns of limitations and physical problems are a call for change. Limitation is not our Divine Pattern. As we let go of the negative we create space for the positive to replace with ease.
Projection can also be a positive phenomenon. The qualities you listed for people you respect are projections of things you want to become - or are becoming. So instead of putting yourself down with phrases like I'm not ______ or I can't ______ I want you to transform the limiting statements with a little 3 letter word - YET (and physical action of hang loose Y hand).
Takeaways:
