We said that when a person overcomes temptation and restrains his inclination, G-d derives great pleasure from this.
This doesn't mean that you can’t ever enjoy yourself, but rather, to wait just a bit ☺️ before indulging in that delicious, pleasurable, permissible treat.
Or
To restrain yourself a bit when you are indulging by not taking it all the way to the end or not filling every single one of your fantasies and desires.
The Talmud teaches that Torah scholars would eat lunch two hours after most other people had eaten. *The average person eats in the fourth hour. Sages eat in the sixth hour*
They didn't do this in order to add more time to their study sessions. In fact, they continued learning after their meal too, for the remainder of the day!
They withheld themselves from food for two extra hours with the intention to delay and restrain the forces of evil and the desire in their hearts.
Self-control doesn’t only apply to the food you feed yourself or the behaviors you engage in.
It applies just as much to the thoughts you permit yourself to indulge in.
There are certain thoughts that are very pleasurable to engage in:
Self-righteousness
Self-pity
Fantasy
You can practice Iskafya (self-control) and subjugate the forces of evil that fuel such thoughts.
Postpone indulging in these thoughts even for just a bit
Maybe it feels like you didn't accomplish anything because you gave in later, but the Zohar states that G-d’s Holy presence & light become elevated and greater as a result.
The impact of G-d’s pleasure is increased holiness and success drawn down to the person who stimulated this whole cycle with his self-restraint.
~☆~
There is a commandment in the Torah And you should sanctify yourselves and be holy.
We need to ensure that aside from the amazing positive good deeds that we do, we also work to control and subjugate the negative passions and inclinations in our hearts.
We need to conduct ourselves as if we were pure and holy.
Until now in Tanya, the Alter Rebbe kept reminding us of the importance of being honest with ourselves:
Not denying our struggles and inclinations
Not lying about the challenges we are facing and where we are holding in life
Acknowledging our impulses and tendencies and accepting that it’s ok and normal for a Beinoni to feel that way…
Then, once you are fully cognizant of your reality, you can push yourself!
Control yourself even if you really, really, really want that ___ (fill in the blank).
Pretend to be holier than you really are - in the areas that you need to work on.
Despite the fact that you really aren’t holy and are very much affected by the desires that fill your heart -
Act as if you were holy…
Conquer the evil! Crush the desire (even temporarily).
Behave in a disciplined, holy manner.
Our sages state in the Talmud: A person sanctifies himself a little bit here in this lowly world, and as a result, is greatly sanctified from Above.
When you work to sanctify yourself in the areas that you struggle with, you will receive assistance from Above!
The Torah assures us:
And you should sanctify yourselves and be holy.
This isn’t a commandment -
It’s a promise!
You will become holy.
In the end, you will succeed in separating yourself from that struggle and temptation.
G-d assists you to slowly, step-by-step, chase away the lust and desire from your heart.
(Note: It is possible for a person to exercise self-restraint in an unhealthy, unspiritual manner. She may restrict what she eats, how she dresses herself, the words she says, or the things she listens to, out of self-righteousness, guilt, or shame…
This isn’t noble and holy.
If this is a person’s tendency, she needs to incorporate the opposite method:
Learn to be happy and enjoy the pleasurable things that G-d created! He put them here for a reason!
It is important for each person to be honest with herself and acknowledge what is motivating her.)
