Show Notes: Making Friends as a Grown Up
Old School with Michele Vrabel featuring Kristen Strong
In this episode of Old School with Michele Vrabel, Michele sits down with Kristen Strong, author of Desperate Woman Seeks Friends, to discuss the challenges and joys of building meaningful friendships, especially later in life. Kristen shares her personal journey as a military spouse, moving from Oklahoma to various locations, and the lessons she learned about forming connections in new environments. Michele and Kristen explore the emotional complexities of friendship, including rejection, vulnerability, and the importance of intentionality. They also discuss practical tips for making friends and the spiritual perspective of trusting God’s plan in relationships.
Key Topics Discussed
Kristen’s background as an Air Force wife and her transition from Oklahoma to Ohio
The challenges of making friends in new places, especially as an adult
Overcoming rejection and managing expectations in friendships
The importance of showing up, opening up, and praying up to build connections
The value of vulnerability and deeper relationships over shallow acquaintances
Practical tips for fostering friendships, such as inviting people into your home
The role of faith in navigating loneliness and finding meaningful relationships
Guest Bio
Kristen Strong is the author of Desperate Woman Seeks Friends, a book inspired by her experiences as a military spouse navigating the challenges of forming friendships in new places. Originally from Oklahoma, Kristen now lives in Colorado Springs, Colorado, with her husband, a retired Air Force officer. Through her writing and speaking, she encourages women to pursue authentic connections and trust God’s guidance in their relationships.
Episode Highlights
Kristen shares how her upbringing in a close-knit Oklahoma community contrasted with the isolation she felt after moving to Ohio as a newlywed.
Michele reflects on her own experiences with rejection and the difficulty of making friends after her divorce.
Kristen introduces her three key principles for making friends: Show Up, Open Up, and Pray Up.
The conversation touches on the emotional intelligence required to handle rejection and the importance of not taking it personally.
Kristen emphasizes the value of inviting people into your home to foster deeper connections, even with simple gatherings.
Both women discuss the spiritual aspect of friendship, trusting God to guide them toward the right relationships.
Quotes
“Making friends is hard because it’s hard, not because there’s anything wrong with me.” — Kristen Strong
“Sometimes rejection is God’s protection against what’s not in your best interest.” — Kristen Strong, quoting her friend Selena
“Expectations kill relationships.” — Kristen Strong, referencing Ann Voskamp
“I want to be what the Lord wants me to be for others and vice versa.” — Michele Vrabel
Resources Mentioned
Desperate Woman Seeks Friends by Kristen Strong
How to Get a Date Worth Keeping by Dr. Henry Cloud
Made for Friendship by Drew Hunter
The Forge (movie referenced by Michele Vrabel)
Keywords
Friendship
Rejection
Vulnerability
Military spouse
Intentionality
Loneliness
Faith
Relationships
Community
Emotional intelligence
Chapters
00:00 - 01:16 Introduction and Setting the Stage
01:16 - 06:11 Kristen’s Journey: From Oklahoma to Military Life
06:11 - 09:57 Michele’s Story: Navigating Friendship After Divorce
09:57 - 15:34 Practical Tips for Making Friends: Show Up, Open Up, Pray Up
15:34 - 23:54 Handling Rejection and Managing Expectations
23:54 - 29:15 The Impact of Social Media and Insecurities on Friendships
29:15 - 36:54 Top Three Takeaways for Building Meaningful Friendships
36:54 - 41:54 The Spiritual Side of Friendship and Final Nuggets of Wisdom
Connect with Kristen:
IG: @kristenstrong
FB: Kristen Strong – Chasing Blue Skies
