Deep Dive into Cornerstone by Jeremy Prayer - Parenting
Parents should approach discipline as a comprehensive and positive act of intentional guidance, deeply rooted in God's love and aimed at a child's spiritual growth, not merely as punishment for misbehavior. This is encapsulated by the Greek word Padia, which encompasses both training and correcting. The foundation for discipline lies in parents continually looking to Jesus and recognizing their own need for God's loving discipline. They should model God's love, communicating that discipline, though difficult, stems from a desire to obey God and is an expression of love, not anger. Every discipline moment serves as an opportunity to show children their profound need for the Gospel and a Savior.
Practically, discipline involves a multi-faceted approach. First, parents must discern the problem by starting with "what" questions to establish facts and identify sin, then progressing to "what were you thinking?" and "what were you feeling?" to uncover heart issues. This "hands, head, heart" framework helps children see the root of their disobedient actions, guiding them to replace sin with godliness. Second, parents must be consistent, predictable, and self-controlled, working as a team to provide clear guidelines and prevent inconsistent submission. Third, it is beneficial to use biblical language whenever possible, framing consequences in terms of disobedience against God's commands and encouraging biblical virtues.
Finally, discipline should be administered effectively. This means providing clear instruction before any discipline, ensuring children understand expectations. During the discipline, it should be done in love, promptly (allowing for cool-down if necessary), in private, and be measured and controlled, never bruising. The process is not complete until reconciliation after the discipline, which involves showing affection, proclaiming the Gospel to highlight both parent's and child's common need for Jesus, praying with them, and guiding them to make restitution for their wrongs. This ensures discipline is restorative and points them towards their need for Christ.
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