Admission is acknowledging our mistakes and learning the feeling of humility. I didn't like how humility felt when I first tried it on. It’s taken me years to soften the blow on my own ego every time I am wrong. I hated being wrong. I hated
someone telling me I’m wrong. I hated people seeming smarter than me. What I didn’t know when I first started admitting my wrongs and what nobody told me in the
beginning of sobriety, was that self-awareness takes practice to notice that I’m wrong more often than I realized, and the utter hatred of being wrong would dissipate over time to a more reasonable feeling like I just lost a game of Kings in the Corner.
Living serenely today means I had to clear out emotional cobwebs. I had to look all that fear in the face—hold up that mirror and say “You did this. This situation is a product of your own behavior.” It did not feel good. It was uncomfortable, but looking back I feel really brave that made things right with myself and with others.
