There’s a connection between adjusting to sobriety and adjusting to my disability. In early sobriety, I was stuck between wanting to socialize and functioning happily while the world kept drinking. Now, in stroke and vestibular recovery, I feel the same “stuckitude” where my vision doesn’t tolerate movement, but the world keeps moving. Acceptance isn’t easy. There’s a complicated grieving process involved, looking back at who I was before and accepting that I didn’t have a choice in this change. In both cases, I’ve felt like I was at a crossroads. With sobriety, it was either live or die. Now, the choice is whether I’m going to the choose happy path each day.
Am I afraid to be happy? Spending time waiting for good to happen is passive living. I didn’t want to be happy in sobriety. I wanted to be happy the way I used to be. And now, I’m doing the same thing with my disability. I don’t want to be happy this way because maybe that means I’m giving up.
Happiness doesn’t mean I have to be grateful for my stroke or that I’m giving up. It just means I’m willing to take a step down the happy path instead of standing at the crossroads, waiting. So today, I choose to let go and take a step forward. I’ll deal with tomorrow tomorrow.
For more information, visit me at recoverydailypodcast.com or email me at rachel@recoverydailypodcast.com.
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For more information about vestibular disorders, visit https://vestibular.org.
#Sobriety #StrokeRecovery #VestibularDisorder #ChooseJoy #HealingJourney #Acceptance #GratitudeInRecovery #LettingGo #MentalHealthMatters #Resilience
