WEW! We're diving back into the zany universe of Ferris Bueller with episodes 5 & 6, and, oh boy, do they deliver the wackiness. Episode 5, aptly titled "Between a Rock and Rooney's Place," celebrates Cameron's 17th birthday—a milestone he's decidedly ambivalent about. Ferris, in his typical fashion, ignores Cameron's wish for a quiet day, opting instead for an extravagant bash. A hilarious revelation about Cameron's birth, triggered by his mom running over her calendar watch, hints at the family's endearing neuroses, mirroring Cameron's own. Ferris' parents are heading out of town for a real estate conference, which is convenient, until Jeannie decides she's going to have the house tented to thwart his attempts (poor, poor Ficus.) We find out their Uncle Stewart might have a gambling addiction, so maybe don't call him or he might find out they left you money while they are away. The absurdity escalates with Ferris installing an answering machine in his locker (because, why not?) and Sloane is apparently the Queen of Swedish Meatballs. Learning that Rooney is also out of town, Ferris seizes the opportunity, commandeering a school bus for a supply run. What ensues is a legendary party at Rooney's, featuring early '90s hip-hop icon Tone Loc, repaying a debt of dubious financial advice to Ferris. The party's zenith crashes as Cameron arrives, soon followed by an ill-intended Rooney, armed with a riding crop for reasons best left unsaid—highlighted by an unfortunate encounter with clown tumbling mats.
Episode 6 ("A Dog and His Boy") finds Ferris taking care of Lucy, a lost dog that wandered into the school and was subsequently adopted by Sloane. Ocean Park High is also the recipient of a "lightly used" 1985 Ford LTD destined for the driver's ed program. Apparently Rooney lowballed Mrs. Finch, a member of the school board, for the car. Ferris makes a creepy pass at his mother, comparing her to Jackie O. and himself to "Little John-John." Jeannie has no academic prospects, but later finds her calling as a vet. Rooney has a vendetta against Lucy, and begs Ferris to get rid of it, and the dog eventually blows up the backseat of Cameron's mom's Lexus after Ferris feeds it a burrito. Finally, we get a bizarre anti-animal-dissection protest that culminates in the grand plan to replace live dissections with computer simulations.
Sloane doesn't fall in either of these episodes... We know you're disappointed by that fact, and so were we. But you can still put on your listening helmet and join us for the recap. You can watch the playlist here, or you could just take our word for it.
