Heather's painful past relationship taught her the importance of setting boundaries, leading her to write a book on the topic. During her conversation with Walt, Heather shared deeply about the emotional and physical abuse she endured without maintaining proper limits. "I spent quite a bit of time looking over what happened in our relationship and what steps I could have taken at different points to prevent a lot of the harm that was done to me," she reflected.
Jodie Lynn also opened up about a past relationship where her values weren't aligned with her partner's. "He like, turned me looked at me, and he said, ownership. And then two hours later, he asked me to marry him. And I still said, yes. But like, what our red flag that our value systems and and obviously, the boundaries that I had for things that I wanted in my life, were non existent," she realized. Both women found healing by learning to honor their needs through boundaries.
Heather's book helps readers establish boundaries in three simple steps: set your boundary, say your boundary, and review how it went. She advises determining one's emotional, material, intellectual, sexual, physical and time boundaries. Walt asked how she narrowed her extensive knowledge into an accessible format. Heather replied that focusing on critical information allows anyone to benefit from her wisdom.
The conversation illuminated how lack of boundaries enables harm. "We've all been in relationships where they didn't bring out the best parts of us either," Walt observed. Heather agreed that truly knowing ourselves and prioritizing our well-being draws supportive people into our lives. By maintaining boundaries, we give others freedom to be their best selves as well.
Her website: https://my.curiouser.life/
Her book, Take No Sh*t!: Build better relationships through discovering, creating and maintaining healthy boundaries in three (sometimes five) simple steps.: https://www.amazon.com/dp/B0CGSZ78NL
Episode page: https://www.loatoday.net/loa2009-heather-claus-lets-talk-boundaries
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