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How often do you base your reactions to people on how you feel? Ever so often, in a burst of anger that goes against my 'inner peace', I have said things that I will regret later - a joke, a jibe, a retort, or even just a point that could've been made better. First, there's the exhaustion from the aggression, then the guilt for saying what I have, and the shame for being the person that does all those things. I could use grit and willpower to be someone else, but that hasn't worked, and I don't think it does. Habits, systems, and routines are more useful for me. So, can a little pause between feeling and responding give us the space that creates better responses? It has helped me and might be something you could try too.