The end of a friendship this week reminded me of how that connection acted as a catalyst for deep healing the 1st time we decided to end our dating relationship and opened up old wounds that needed to be addressed.
The initial rejection and abandonment opened a rawness, allowing deep buried pain and fears to emerge that had been stuffed away in Pandora's box. And down I went into this rabbit hole asking all of the what-if questions that unrooted my deepest fear.
The fear that I was unlovable.
Cracking open my heart allowed the pain to emerge, the fears to be released, and my heart to heal. As excruciating as that process was, my only regret was that I didn't do it sooner. Because the pain of the release was much less than the weight of the pain I had been consistently carrying over the course of 2 years. Maybe longer.
The weight on our hearts is a lot when we continue to carry things like sadness, grief, fear and shame. It’s heavy and burdensome because those things were never meant to be taken with us. If you are still holding onto those things because you think you have to, it is OK to set them down. They aren’t yours anymore. Release the shame, it was never yours to carry. Release the fear. You don’t have to be afraid. Release yourself from the prison you created because you believe punishing yourself is what you deserve.
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