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Bluetooth is taking over, Orlando Bloom is injecting microplastics into his bloodstream, and apparently your bald uncle just flew to Turkey for a new hairline. We unpack the very real goo that rained down on Washington, theorize about Stranger Things' big finale, and ask the age-old question: what the hell is Fat Joe being sued for now? Also, celebrities are into some truly unholy stuff — and yes, we’re judging.
It was all a game... but we’re losing.
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