⚠️ Trigger Warning
This episode discusses suicidal thoughts and experiences. If you or someone you know is struggling, you are not alone. Help is available—call or text 988 to reach the Suicide and Crisis Lifeline (available 24/7 in the U.S.). You can also visit 988lifeline.org for chat and resources.
In this reflective and deeply personal episode, Denise and Tim open up about what service really means—before, during, and long after the uniform comes off.
With Veterans Day on the horizon, they dive into Tim’s 21 years in the U.S. Army and National Guard, exploring the reasons he joined at 26, the realities of deployment, and the invisible work of coming home changed.
From chaotic nights in Iraq to quiet commutes haunted by old instincts, this episode reveals the courage, complexity, and cost of serving something greater than yourself—and how identity, family, and purpose evolve when the mission ends.
What We Talk About
- The meaning of service—and why it’s about more than uniforms or wars
- Joining the military later in life and finding purpose through the National Guard
- Deploying after 9/11: from training to real-world combat
- The moral weight of decisions made in chaos
- Life after service: rebuilding empathy, trust, and perspective
- How family, love, and community sustain you through the hard parts
- What it means to pass on a legacy of service to the next generation
Quote of the Episode
“Being of use to something greater than yourself—that’s what service means to me.” — Tim Waters
Conversation Starters
- What does service mean to you? How do you show up for something bigger than yourself?
- Have you ever faced a moment that changed how you saw your purpose or identity?
- How can we better support veterans—and anyone—navigating big life transitions?
Resources & Mentions
- 🎥 Sheepdog (2025), directed by Steven Grayhm — a gripping new drama following a decorated veteran court-ordered into treatment as he confronts trauma, forgiveness, and healing. Premiered at the 40th Annual Boston Film Festival and inspired by real stories of post-traumatic growth in veteran communities.
- Restoring the Soul of America — stories of veterans finding meaning beyond deployment.
Tools & Practices
- Practice gratitude for those who serve—write a thank-you letter, donate to veteran-support orgs, or volunteer locally.
- Reflection prompt: What’s one way you can contribute to the greater good in your community this week?
Connect & Reflect
We’d love to hear your reflections on service. Tag @theroughdraft and share your story, or tell us about someone who’s inspired you to serve in your own way. Your words might help someone else remember they’re not alone.
Mini Moment
Tim recalls his first mission as a National Guardsman—arriving to a protest site where “there were supposed to be thousands” but found only fifteen people and silence. Years later, that same sense of readiness turned to reality in Iraq, where one night’s split-second decision could mean life or loss. Denise and Tim talk about guilt, empathy, and what it means to “reset your filters” when coming home to a world that has kept moving.
Try This
- Reflect on your own form of service. Where do you contribute, and why does it matter to you?
- Make space for real stories—listen deeply, without comparison.
