If you’ve spent the last few years trying to figure out what motivates conservatives, I have two words for you: sexual frustration.
It’s obvious in everything from their unfounded anger to the contorted expressions on their faces. These people are backed up and ready to explode, and they’ve deluded themselves into thinking it’s somehow our fault.
The right is a seething mass of trembling, pathetic, and fragile “involuntary celibates” questing desperately for a release. Basically, every one of their fundamental policy positions can be connected to a lack of success with women or the kind of hostile self-loathing that comes from a violent denial of their own sexuality.
The political right is what happens when entitled white men can’t get a date or they refuse to accept their own needs and desires. It’s unfortunate that our whole nation has to suffer because of the impact and the influence of this pitiful group that never evolved past the most awkward feelings of post-pubescent angst.
Blatant misogyny
The right is run by frustrated white men who seem to think that women serve no other purpose in life other than to act as their playthings. Right-wing males become visibly angry when women are educated, receive high paying jobs, or earn positions of power.
Don’t be confused by the example of conservative supreme court justices who are so committed to the belief that a woman’s place is in the home that they are willing to take high profile jobs out of the home to ensure no other woman gets the same opportunity. When a right-wing individual appoints a woman to a position of power, it’s always to work against the interest of other women.
The right was willing to elect sexual predators. The right prefers a power structure where men have total control, so women have to endure their cavemanlike antics just to obtain the benefits of food and shelter.
Pro-rapist activism
Another foundational policy of the right is their steadfast insistence that white men should control all reproductive rights. It’s almost as if the right is fearful they will vanish from the Earth unless they are able to guarantee their own progeny through the most brutal form of violation imaginable.
That the right claims to be “pro-life” is the most blatant form of hypocrisy because they steadfastly refuse to endorse any policy which actually might have a chance of lowering the rate of abortion. They would have all pregnant women drink polluted water, breathe tainted air, and be stripped of health insurance. None of these objectives support the intention of preserving life, but are instead conceived to create an environment of absolute control.
Scientific evidence, which the right always ignores, demonstrates that legislation is an ineffective way to reduce the abortion rate. Every argument the right misappropriates about the ineffectiveness of laws to stop violent shootings are actually applicable to the concept of abortion.
Fixation on phallic substitutes
Speaking of guns, it’s comical how much the right is fixated on objects and machinery that help them overcome insecurities over their inadequate endowment. Every time you have a pleasant afternoon walk ruined by a pathetic little weasel revving the engine of a foreign-made pickup truck, you can accurately assume the man is both Republican and overcompensating for something.
Liberals are never inclined to strut up and down highways coal rolling cyclists or pedestrians. This is because liberals are secure in their ability to provide sexual satisfaction to their partners. Insecurity is rampant among the right, and leads to the purchase of big engines and big guns.
Conservatives are so overprotective of the phallic substitutes which allow them to cling to their delusions of sexual prowess that they defend gun rights with vehement hysteria. They aren’t afraid that the government will become tyrannical, they’re afraid that the government will take away the only thing that makes them feel like a man.
Self-loathing
No matter what conservatives say, you have a right to be homosexual and to be accepted for who you are. Brainwashing people to hate themselves is a terrible kind of abuse.
The right-wing attacks on the LGBTQ+ community represent fundamental jealousy that other people in our society rightfully allow themselves the pleasures and satisfactions many right-wing zealots wrongly feel an obligation to reject. This aspect of their mentality is really quite sad. Despite the assurances from reasonable people to encourage tolerance and acceptance of LGBTQ+ rights, right-wing zealots are inclined to sentence themselves to a life of personal torment.
There have been many examples throughout history of men who have lived in agony and inflicted harm on others because of malicious outside influences that pressured them to deny their own sexual preference. The frustration that builds as a result of this course of action leads to anger, hostility, and even violence.
It is unfortunate that our nation has to endure so much prejudicial legislation because of neurotic white men who can’t accept that they’re not a 0 on the Kinsey scale. If a politician is unable to arrive at a truthful assessment of this, a most basic personality trait, then how can we trust them with major, complex, and complicated national issues?
Right-wing porn consumption
The hypocritical nature of conservatives is not a matter of speculation. What right-wingers often overlook is that data exists which correlates political leaning and porn consumption. Further studies could be refined to give astonishingly revealing information on search terms, although that’s a line I’d prefer not to cross.
It should be of no surprise to anyone that right-leaning geographic areas show much higher consumption of pornography.
Please keep that in mind the next time your pastor takes you aside and tells you about some weekend study retreat he recommends for your adolescent daughter under his supervision. As for me, my girls aren’t going anywhere near a church.
What can a right-wing man really offer?
Right-wing thinking is a cesspool for deviant and exploitative sexual attitudes that taint everything else they believe. It starts early when button-down, conservative men decide it’s a good idea to make their daughters take abstinence or virginity pledges even though there’s overwhelming evidence this concept simply doesn’t work.
That abstinence is the preferred birth control of religious groups is especially comical because the Bible itself has the most prominent historical example of its ineffectiveness. How can preachers unironically spend half of a sermon touting the advantages of abstinence, and the other half praising the miracle of a virgin birth?
The whole “traditional family” concept that mirrors what you see in 50s era advertising where women are depicted as sub-human servants and disposable sex toys needs to be universally denounced. This is a psychologically damaging way for people to think, and it’s rampant on the right.
What can right-wing men do?
Many of the problems in our society could be fixed if conservatives could just figure out how to not be so reprehensible that cats try to bury them every time they walk past a litter box. The number one thing that they need to learn is to not smell bad. Seriously, if you’re having trouble getting a date, take a shower, put on deodorant, and wash your clothing. That right there would probably be enough to elevate the general satisfaction level of the whole world by something close to 50%.
Next, have some consideration for the needs and desires of other people. I know that conservatives find it amusing to mock the feelings of “snowflakes,” but how’s that working out? Is it really so hard to comprehend that maybe the fact that nobody cares anything for what you need is partially a result of your astonishing entitlement and self-absorption?
Almost all the right-wing idiots I know are either divorced, single, or miserable. What do they possibly gain by maintaining their commitment to a deeply flawed and unsatisfactory personal philosophy? If you’re tired of being a sexually frustrated right-wing lunatic, try taking it upon yourself to comprehend the needs of others. Essentially, your potential for happiness depends on engaging in all the things that conservatives routinely deride and reject.
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