It’s difficult to imagine a subject more stupefyingly dull than accounting. It makes economics seem like a Michael Bay movie. Thus, you will soon experience a long, restful sleep. Because we’re going to read from Accounting, Theory and Practice, “a text-book for colleges and schools of business administration,” by Roy B. Kester, Ph.D. This particular edition, published in 1922, is dedicated to his father and mother, in “appreciation for their steadfast interest in my work.” They were, no doubt, feigning interest. Of course, the world as we know it would cease turning without accounting, so we can be grateful for it—and for the bright women and men who do find it engaging. They make oodles of money, so do not pity them. In fact, “oodles of money” is one of the first terms they learn. Once again, I must warn you not to operate heavy or even light machinery while listening to Textbook Sleep, the Maximum-Strength Sleep Aid. Consider my friend Mike, who reported: “I killed my Sonicare after just two quadrants, so as not to take undue risk.” Let us proceed with similar caution.
This recording will end quietly.
