“There is a massive void in how men are being spoken to, and it’s being filled by people who are feeding young men a lie—that being a man means being rich, jacked, dominant, and cruel. If you have a platform and you don’t try to counter that, you’re letting it happen. We don’t need one group to succeed—we need hundreds, thousands of men showing a different version of masculinity, one rooted in kindness, accountability, and actually giving a damn about other people.”
~ Tim Fullerton ~
Masculinity In Review
This conversation with Tim Fullerton sits at a critical junction in the Intelligent Masculinity series. Where previous episodes explored ego, discipline, authenticity, accountability, patience, stewardship, and civic responsibility, this discussion is all about influence — what it means to intentionally and publicly model masculinity, especially when you have a large reach, power, and platforms. Tim approaches masculinity as a set of daily choices: how you treat people, what you normalize, and what you refuse to excuse. His perspective is shaped by family legacy, grief, parenthood, and his recent work building Find Out Podcast into Find Out Media as a purposeful way to replace the destructive narratives targeting young men online.
Tim’s understanding of masculinity begins at home. His father and grandfather modeled kindness, restraint, and curiosity about the world — values that shaped him as much through their strengths as through their failures. Importantly, Tim does not romanticize his upbringing while speaking candidly about watching his father struggle with alcoholism later in life — and how that experience taught him the cost of unprocessed grief and avoidance. Rather than turning this into bitterness, Tim reframes it as a responsibility: to recognize patterns early and refuse to pass them on. Here we can easily see, Intelligent masculinity is not perfection — it is awareness paired with deliberate interruption.
A recurring theme throughout our interview is Tim’s rejection of cruelty masquerading as toughness. He draws a sharp contrast between masculinity that relies on fear, slurs, and hierarchy — and masculinity grounded in empathy, curiosity, and respect for difference. Tim’s definition of intelligent, or positive, masculinity is strikingly simple: be kind, be supportive, and don’t punch down. In an online environment flooded with grievance-based masculinity, Tim positions kindness not as weakness, but as discipline — the ongoing effort to lead with humanity even when anger would be easier.
As a father, Tim is acutely aware that masculinity is absorbed long before it is explained — our kids learn and pick-up on way more than we ever give them credit for. He emphasizes the importance of purposeful exposure — travel, diversity, conversation — as needed and essential lived experiences. Showing his son that difference is normal, safe, and interesting is the foundations of moral understanding. This lesson reinforces a core theme of our series: men do not raise children through lectures, but through presence and example.
As we continue, Tim and I discuss the importance of his work with Find Out Media as more than just content creation — instead, as counter-programming. He is explicit about the vacuum in masculine models being filled by figures like Andrew Tate and Nick Fuentes — and equally explicit that this vacuum exists because too many men on the left have avoided masculinity conversations altogether. Intelligent masculinity, in Tim’s view, demands active participation — if you have reach, you have responsibility — and neutrality is not an option when young men are being actively radicalized by false promises of dominance, wealth, and entitlement.
One of the most human moments in our conversation comes when Tim admits he is not especially good at structured self-reflection. His mind moves constantly — a constantly moving river where stillness is hard. Yet rather than turning that into self-criticism, he articulates a forward-looking ethic: live your values while minimizing regret and allow yourself grace as a human being who will make mistakes. This aligns cleanly with the series thesis: accountability is not self-punishment — it is ownership for the consequences of our actions and values.
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Nick’s Notes
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I’m Nick Paro, and I’m sick of the shit going on. So, I’m using poetry, podcasting, and lives to discuss the intersections of chronic illness and mental wellbeing, masculinity, veteran’s issues, politics, and so much more. I am only able to have these conversations, bring visibility to my communities, and fill the void through your support — this is a publication where engagement is encouraged, creativity is a cornerstone, and transparency is key — please consider becoming a paid subscriber today and grow the community!
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