This has been top of mind recently! Where to start…for me, everything is seen through the question: How can I integrate what I want to believe into my real human life? I say that I want to dismantle supremacy and deeply conditioned + internalized colonialism - so how do I practice that every day in every way? We are all taught to compartmentalize every part of our lives. Our love lives. Work lives. Play lives. It’s all connected like how we say that all liberation is tied together.
So naturally, as I’m shifting into applying myself towards liberation, being with other aligned folks happens naturally (VERY thankful for that, because I know that it’s not true for everyone.) Falling for people who have aligned values is going to happen. It’s hot! I’m falling for people platonically and romantically left and right!
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The platonic part feels really good and hopeful. I’ve found myself saying to people that right now is the time to see what relationships have potential to be grown into long term community. Our movement is rooted in that. It cannot happen in isolation. Period. So that part feels vulnerable, but mostly anxiety free.
The romantic part has a different essence. The conditioning around romantic connection is so obvious to me right now. It’s daunting, but I also feel really excited to practice what I want to embody. This year has been the year of flow and self permission for true freedom. My rigidity and desire for control is based from my own trauma and fear of the unknown.
I really feel like this next season of healing is giving myself permission to really trust myself. Magic and success can look like so many things outside of monogamous long term romantic partnership.
I’ve already experience such deep connection with folks who were not and is not my long term romantic partner. I’ve already seen and felt the beauty of connection in many different forms.
So in this lifetime of liberation work, it’s time to heal more and be cohesive in the values I say I have. I can feel myself writing in such a vague way haha! Vulnerability is scary!
Ok having a romantic crush during this time is a wild thing. Everything in my body is buzzing from the trauma of being in this world and then to have these moments of possibility and connection makes the buzzing even more intense. I think I have some anxiety around it, because I’ve been conditioned that romantic connection are dangerous in a way. It’s a big risk of being hurt and/or harmed. It’s a big risk to the community in the case it doesn’t go well. I’m watching this webinar called Dismantling the Romance Myth by Dean Spade, and it’s really good. The reminders of colonial conditioning around cis het monogomous culture was really helpful.
Liberatory movement and being around aligned community is beautiful, and will inevitably bring forth all kinds of connections and attractions and insecurities and fears. We have what it takes to practice true community care. We have the opportunity to maneuver through the complexity of our own personal traumas and biases AND experience love in its fullness (not just romantic love.)
Romantic connections does not HAVE to create harm and division in communities. Our liberatory framework applies in every way when we are with our people and in the world.
I have so many more thoughts about this, but that’s all I’ll share today!
What does Liberatory Imagination spark in me today?
Big love. The commitment to flattening the hierarchy of different types of love. The commitment to leaning in. The commitment to embodying what we say we stand for. Liberatory imagination sparks in me the motivation to build a world where ease and expansiveness is the norm - free from colonial trauma.
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