BLOG PODS #4 - Diagnosed With ADHD as an Adult - #1 Challenges
INTRODUCTION:
It’s not that long ago that I had to come to terms with being an adult with ADHD. I was a child with ADHD too, of course, but I didn’t know it then.
After years of suspecting so, I decided to ask two child psychiatrist friends if they thought I actually did have ADHD. They both laughed and said, ‘of course!’ and ‘definitely!’
I guess being called ‘Tigger’ at school was closer to the mark than we all thought at the time.
DIAGNOSIS:
A Turning Point
You may be like me in that you’re an adult and beginning to feel the effects of living life at high speed and want to manage things better to stay well. Or you may be younger and struggling to get going in life and want to know if ADHD might explain the challenges. Or may be you’re parenting a child you think has the condition & feeling a bit lost on where to turn.
Whatever the reason or stage of life you find yourself in, getting an assessment is a good thing. Really. It brings clarity, opens the door to new treatments and opportunities, and signals a new phase of life where you know clearly what you’re dealing with.
So it’s definitely a good thing.
But, if the assessment results in a diagnosis of ADHD, there are some challenges, too. Here’s a quick summary of a few of them; I offer these by way of validation for those who’ve already walked this path and as a word-to-the-wise for others who are earlier in the process. As always, it’s not an exhaustive list - just a few pointers.
Challenges Faced by Adults Receiving an ADHD Diagnosis
1. Late Recognition and Missed opportunities
Many adults with ADHD go undiagnosed during childhood. As a result, they may have coped with challenges like impulsivity, inattention, and hyperactivity without understanding the root cause or having clearly defined strategies to make life easier.
Some don’t really cope at all and life has been fraught with loss, failed relationships, addiction, injury, frustration and more.
💡 A delayed diagnosis can lead to a sense of anger or frustration at missed opportunities for interventions earlier in life. There may even be a period of grieving what was lost or ‘what could’ve been.’
2. Impact on Daily Functioning
ADHD can significantly affect daily life, from work and personal relationships to a sense of being able to focus and achieve. Adults may struggle with time management, organization, and maintaining focus on tasks.
Challenges in the workplace can lead to stress, poor career progression and difficulties in meeting expectations - those of others and those that are self-imposed.
For some, the impact of ADHD has meant no real ‘career’ at all; instead, they lurch from job to job with a pervasive sense of confusion and frustration about why things are as they are.
💡 A diagnosis, while helpful in the longer term, can bring such difficulties into sharp focus, the realisation of which becomes a challenge in itself.
3. Emotional Well-being
Receiving an ADHD diagnosis can stir up a range of emotions, including relief, validation and, sometimes, a sense of loss and/or anger for the years spent grappling with challenges. Particularly as we were doing so ‘in the dark,’ as it were, not knowing why things were a struggle.
Emotional dysregulation is a common feature of ADHD, which can make dealing with them difficult at the best of times. Doing so in the context of a new diagnosis may be particularly challenging - it certainly was for me.
💡 Learning to manage the emotional struggles of the condition and then of a new diagnosis, can be especially tricky in the journey towards increasing stability.
4. Stigma and Misunderstanding:
There can be a real stigma surrounding ADHD, often perpetuating common misconceptions about the disorder. For example:
* ‘We’re all a bit like that, aren’t we?’
* ‘It’s not a condition, they’re just ‘busy’ people’
* ‘They just need to be a bit more careful, organised, disciplined, (fill in the blank)…’
Adults may face judgment or skepticism from others when they talk about their diagnosis; this can impact their self-esteem and confidence, leading to isolation/withdrawal or even questioning the diagnosis itself.
It’s so important not to allow the ignorance of others about the condition to influence how we perceive ourselves.
💡 Your priority is you; press on, lift your chin, reject the one-dimensional quick judgments of anyone else (even family) and stay the course - build a regimen that suits you and you really will become a better version of yourself. Eventually.
5. Treatment Adjustments:
Adjusting to ADHD medications, if prescribed, can be a process of trial and error; navigating side effects, getting the dosage right and settling into new life-habits all takes time.
Managing side effects and understanding the medication's role in overall treatment can be challenging. Establishing new routines and ways of organising things can be tricky, too; as can settling into therapy or ADHD coaching.
The sense of seeing life differently and building a new reality now the condition is known, can feel a bit overwhelming.
💡 In my experience though - and that of others I’ve talked to - is that there are very few ‘cons,’ particularly once the titration (finding the right dosage) is done and your strategies are in place. You’ll learn to manage the downside of it and release the strengths. And there are lots of strengths - more on this in future posts!
6. Overwhelm:
While receiving a diagnosis of ADHD can be a relief, it does bring new challenges.
For example, you might find yourself asking:
* ‘How will I deal with the future as an adult with ADHD?’
* ‘Will my marriage, job, relationships, achievements in the future be like the ones in the past - fraught with problems and disappointment - or is there hope for better things?’
* ‘Having lost so much as a result of this condition, how can I make the most of the time I have left?’ (This was a big one for me)
The pressure to make the most of the future while dealing with regret about the past can feel like a heavy burden, for sure. But, this too will pass! You will get through it and find a new sense of clarity, purpose and encouragement - so please keep going!
FINAL THOUGHTS:
Discovering that you have Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder (ADHD) as an adult can be a revelation. It often brings clarity to past struggles while presenting new challenges.
I hope you get a sense from this post that this is a normal part of the process.
In the next post, I’ll look at some tips for building hope and pressing through some of the challenges. This condition of ours can be managed well. More than that, the myriad strengths and positive aspects of ADHD can be harnessed to produce a life that is more fun, fulfilling and productive than it was before the diagnosis.
See you in the next one!
More information:
* BOOK: Taking Charge of Adult ADHD - Proven Strategies to Succeed at Work, at Home, and in Relationships by Russell A. Barkley - click here (affiliate link)
* BOOK: Scattered Minds - The Origins & Healing of ADHD by Gabor Maté - click here (affiliate link)
* BOOK: ADHD 2.0 by Ed Halliwell & John Ratey - click here (affiliate link)
* ADHD Test: Do I Have ADHD? - click here
* ADHD Test: For Women - click here
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©️ Jonny Matthew 2024
