Your values are not just words—they’re the compass that guides every decision, action, and connection.
When your beliefs are deeply understood and consistently expressed, you show up with unwavering clarity, confidence, and integrity.
KNOW is an acronym for Key Notions of Worth. Here’s what they mean in the context of queer integrity.
K – Key
Identify the core values and beliefs that are essential to who you are—the ones that must be honoured if you’re to live and lead with integrity.
N – Notions
Bring conscious awareness to the principles and perceptions you hold about yourself, others, and the world—especially those that operate below the surface.
O – Of
Recognize that values without action are just ideas. The word ‘of’ reminds us that values live in relation to action, experience, and purpose.
W – Worth
Define what truly matters—to you and for the greater good. Worth is not just what you believe in; it’s what you’re willing to stand up for, consistently and courageously.
Your personal code of conduct is your ethical GPS directing how you lead, communicate, and connect.
When you KNOW what you stand for, self-doubt fades, and the impact of your leadership grows exponentially.
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So…What Do You Stand For?
There’s a saying I love: “If you don’t know what you stand for, you won’t have a leg to stand on.”
And one of the oldest teachings from the Tao Te Ching reminds us:
“The journey of a thousand miles begins beneath your feet.”
Both sayings point to the same truth: to take meaningful steps forward, you first need to know where you stand.
How does knowing where you stand affect your leadership?
To lead with queer integrity, you must know your values, what is ethical to you, what your values are, and how you show up in the world as someone who embodies what they stand for—truthfully, consistently, and with courage. Using another word: integrity.
Knowing where you stand on important issues is like knowing your exact location on a map—only then can you take a meaningful step in the direction of your values.
STANDPOINT—What Do You Stand For?
If you haven’t already watched today’s video, go do that now.
* In one to three sentences, describe what you stand for—what you believe to be true, meaningful, and right.
* Why does this matter so deeply to you? What makes it meaningful in your life or leadership?
* How do you know what you believe to be true?
* Consider: What shaped this belief—experience, environment, or education?
* Then ask, “How do I know if this is true?” Embracing uncertainty can deepen your clarity and strengthen your integrity.
* What do you do consistently that reflects your commitment to this belief or value?
* How can your actions inspire others to follow you, not because they agree, but because they trust you?
A Final Question from the Margins
After completing this exercise, review your responses. Then consider:
What part of your queerness do you want to recognize as something that nourishes your sense of worth, anchors your values, and reminds you who you are?
Tomorrow, you’ll discover the third principle of queer integrity, The Way You THINK.
Want to explore these principles with more clarity, depth, and guidance? Learn more about working with me one-on-one and request a conversation here: https://www.darrenstehle.com/coaching
