Welcome to this MAD Coaching Habit from Difference Makers by John Michael
This is Dan’s story.
Introduction: The Invisible Weight.
Success is loud. Meetings, deadlines, emails, interruptions, notifications—it never stops. My life was filled with this noise, and on paper, it all looked perfect. A good salary, a respected title, and a reputation for solving problems no one else could crack.
Oh, I’m not bragging. Because inside, in secret. Or at least I thought it was a secret. I was drowning.
At night, when the world went quiet, my mind refused to follow. My thoughts spun in endless loops, replaying mistakes and forecasting failures. I’d lie awake, staring at the ceiling, asking myself, Why does it still feel like I’m not enough?
One Friday night, late. I sat in my car after work, staring blankly at the steering wheel. The lights in the house glowed softly, my family waiting inside. But I couldn’t bring myself to go in. I felt paralysed by exhaustion—not physical, but mental. Is this it? I thought.
My phone buzzed, shaking me out of the spiral. It was a message from Karen, my old mentor:
“The mind isn’t just a tool for work—it’s the lens through which we experience life. Are you taking care of yours? Selah.”
Was she telepathic?
Selah. I’d heard the word before, buried in the Psalms, but I’d never thought much about it. It means “pause” or “reflect.” That weekend, her message echoed in my mind.
On Sunday, the pastor read Proverbs 4:23: “Above all else, guard your heart, for everything you do flows from it.” I thought about the noise in my mind—the endless deadlines, self-doubt, and fear. My heart wasn’t the problem. It was my racing mind.
I knew something had to change.
☀️✨🌟✨☀️
The Wake-Up Call: Selah Begins.
Karen agreed to meet me for coffee the next week. I unloaded everything—my anxiety, my sleepless nights, the gnawing feeling of not being enough. When I finally stopped, she leaned forward.
“Daniel, do you know what Selah means?”
I shrugged. “Something from the Psalms?”
“It’s more than that,” she said. “It’s an invitation. In scripture, Selah appears between verses, like a sacred pause. It reminds us to stop and reflect before moving forward. You need that.”
I frowned. “How? My brain never stops.”
“That’s because you’re stuck in high Beta waves,” she said. “Beta is the brainwave for solving problems and staying alert—great for work, but terrible if you never shift out of it. Your mind is like a car stuck in top gear. It’s no wonder you feel burned out.”
She pulled out her notebook and sketched a chart. “Your brain has five wave states: Gamma for deep focus and insight, Beta for problem-solving, Alpha for relaxation, Theta for creativity, and Delta for healing sleep. Selah is about learning to shift out of Beta into slower states like Alpha or Theta.”
“Huh?” Something struck me oddly. “Alpha is slower for relaxation, and Beta is faster for problem-solving? Are you sure about that, Karen?”
“Quite sure.” Karen smiled in reply. “It just so happens that Alpha waves were discovered first.” Then they discovered Beta waves - and they happened to be faster. Then they found Gamma, which were faster still. Then the slower Delta waves. It’s simply an anomaly of the scientific process.”
“OK.” It was a reasonable explanation.
Other than that, her words clicked. I’d been living in constant overdrive, but I had no idea how to slow down.
Karen handed me a book and said, “Start small. Practice stillness. Just pause—Selah.”
📘📗📙📕📚
Understanding the Brain’s Wiring
That evening, I opened the book and read about how brainwaves dictate everything—our focus, emotions, energy, and creativity. It described how most of us stay locked in Beta, jumping from task to task, our minds buzzing like overworked engines.
But it also offered hope. The book explained neuroplasticity—the brain’s ability to rewire itself. Every time I paused, I was creating new neural pathways, strengthening my ability to rest and reflect.
One chapter explained the role of gratitude in shifting the brain from Beta to Alpha. Gratitude, it said, boosts serotonin, the brain’s feel-good chemical, helping us relax and see life more clearly. Who’d have thought that being thankful for something or someone would make you more relaxed and fee good? Amazing!
As I read, Psalm 139:14 came to mind: “I am fearfully and wonderfully made.” God had designed my brain with incredible complexity and intention. It wasn’t just a tool for work; it was a reflection of His creativity, meant to be cared for, not overworked.
⚙️🔧🛠️⚙️🔩
New Habits: Living Selah.
Karen told me to start small: two minutes of stillness a day. It sounded simple, but when I sat down that first morning, my thoughts went wild. Emails, deadlines, and doubts swirled in my head.
“Just breathe,” Karen had said. “Focus on your breath. When your mind wanders, gently bring it back. Selah.”
It’s harder than it sounds, let me tell you. Sitting still for two minutes and breathing is one of the hardest things I had to learn to do.
I inhaled deeply for four counts, held it for four, and exhaled for six. At first, it felt a bit of a strain and it felt pointless. But then I remembered Psalm 46:10: “Be still, and know that I am God.” Slowly, I focused only on my breath and the noise in my head began to quiet.
Over the next week, I added gratitude to my routine. Every morning, I wrote down one thing I was thankful for. It was awkward at first, but soon, I started noticing small joys—a warm cup of coffee, a kind word from a colleague.
Karen had said the real trick was to notice one new thing to be thankful for each day. Not just a rote repeat, but actually begin to notice. That was tough after a week or so. But then they became easier and easier to spot in every moment of every day.
At work, I set a timer for 90-minute intervals. Every time it went off, I took a two-minute “brain break” to breathe and refocus. These moments of Selah became my anchors in a chaotic day.
Evenings were the hardest. I was so used to numbing out with TV or scrolling my phone. But I began replacing that habit with scripture. As I read Proverbs 3:5–6—“Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding”—I realised how much I’d been leaning on my own strength.
🌱🌿🌳🌿🌱
Selah in Action.
A few weeks in, my wife noticed the change. “You’re different,” she said. “Lighter. More present. More, erm, unhurried. Calm even.”
At work, my team started commenting on my calmness. One colleague said, “You seem unfazed, even when things get crazy. What’s your secret?”
It wasn’t a secret. It was Selah.
Karen reminded me of Ephesians 2:10: “For we are God’s handiwork, created in Christ Jesus to do good works.” I realised my leadership wasn’t just about solving technical problems. It was about inspiring my team and modelling what a healthy mind looks like.
I even started introducing Selah moments in meetings. Before diving into agendas, I’d invite everyone to pause, breathe, and reflect. The atmosphere shifted. People became more focused, less defensive.
🔍✅🔄✅🔍
Selah as Growth.
Three months later, Karen and I met to reflect. I told her about my wins: better sleep, deeper relationships, and a greater sense of purpose. But I also admitted my struggles.
“Some days, I skip it all,” I said. “Work takes over.”
She smiled. “That’s normal. Selah isn’t about perfection; it’s about progress. Each time you return to it, you’re reinforcing those new neural pathways.”
She encouraged me to review what was working, tweak what wasn’t, and keep going. She quoted Lamentations 3:23: “His mercies are new every morning.” That reminder of grace lifted the weight of guilt.
💬🤝🌐🤝💬
Selah for Others.
One day, I noticed Mark, a younger colleague, looking frazzled. I invited him to lunch and shared my story.
“Have you ever heard of Selah?” I asked.
He shook his head.
“It’s an invitation to pause and reflect. It’s changed my life. Can I show you?”
I taught him the breathing exercise and shared Philippians 4:6–7: “Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God… will guard your hearts and minds.”
Watching Mark’s transformation reminded me of Karen’s words: “Selah isn’t just for you. It’s for those you lead.”
The Power of Selah
Looking back, I see how God used my restless mind to draw me closer to Him. Selah became more than a practice—it became a way of living.
If my story resonates with you, I invite you to start your own Selah journey. Breathe deeply. Reflect on God’s Word. And when you feel the change, share it with someone who needs it.
Because Selah isn’t just a pause. It’s a chance to realign with the purpose God has for you.
Selah.
Conclusion: The Selah Framework for a Purposeful Life.
“Selah”—pause, reflect, and reset. It’s more than a word; it’s an invitation to take charge of your mind, align your life with God’s purpose, and lead with clarity and calm. Here’s how you can bring the concept of Selah into your own life.
Why You Should Do This (Motivate).
Like Daniel in the story, many of us are stuck in overdrive, mentally exhausted yet unable to slow down. Constant stress, self-doubt, and anxiety aren’t just draining—they’re barriers to the purpose God designed us for.
Selah is your way to break free. By pausing and reflecting, you create space for clarity, peace, and growth. This practice helps you:
* Guard your mind and heart (Proverbs 4:23).
* Reset your brain from its overworked Beta state.
* Discover God’s presence in the stillness (Psalm 46:10).
Without Selah, life becomes a noisy blur. With it, you open the door to transformation.
What You Need to Know (Acquire).
To live a life of Selah, understand these key ideas:
* Your Brain is Wired for Change: Through neuroplasticity, your brain rewires itself based on repeated behaviours. Small, intentional actions—like pausing and practicing gratitude—literally reshape your mind.
* Brainwaves Control Your Mental State:
* Gamma Waves are associated with insight and those “aha” moments. Super fast - use sparingly.
* Beta waves keep you alert but can cause burnout if overused. Our “normal” state of being. Fast and burn a lot of power.
* Alpha waves foster relaxation and reflection. Slower waves that are excellent for learning new things.
* Theta waves encourage creativity and peace. Associated with dreaming - even day-dreaming.
* Delta waves enable deep rest and healing. these are really slow, associated with really deep, non-dreaming sleep. Get plenty of these and you are very well rested. Some monks can achieve this awake! But it takes a lot of practice.
* Selah Creates Space for Growth: Pausing allows you to shift from Beta to slower brainwave states - alpha and theta mostly but some can get down to delta, where rest, insight, and connection with God occur deeply.
Scripture reinforces these truths. As Ephesians 2:10 reminds us, we are created for good works. But to fulfil this purpose, we must take care of our minds. And consider Romans 8:26 - how praying in the Spirit slows or even suspends our thought process.
How You Can Practice (Knowledge Application).
* Morning Selah:
* Spend 2–5 minutes in stillness each morning.
* Practice deep breathing: Inhale for four counts, hold for four, exhale for six.
* Reflect on a verse, like Proverbs 3:5–6: “Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding.”
* Gratitude Journaling:
* Write down 1–3 (new) things you’re grateful for daily. Gratitude shifts your brain into Alpha, releasing serotonin for relaxation and positivity.
* Brain Breaks:
* Every 90 minutes, take a 2-minute Selah break. Step away, breathe deeply, and reset your mind.
* Evening Reflection:
* End your day with 5 minutes of quiet reflection. Journal your thoughts and pray, asking for God’s guidance and peace.
Start small, just as Daniel did, and build consistency over time.
Steps You Can Take in Real Life (Empower).
* Set Cues for Your Habits:
* Use triggers to remind yourself to pause. For example:
* Morning coffee becomes your cue for breathing exercises.
* A timer at work signals a brain break.
* Turning off the TV signals time for evening reflection.
* Establish Routines and Rewards:
* Routine: Pair your Selah practices with existing habits.
* Reward: Celebrate small wins. For example, after a successful morning reflection, thank God for the clarity it brought.
* Find Your “Selah Places”:
* Identify quiet spots where you can pause. It might be your kitchen table in the morning, a quiet park bench, or even your car between meetings.
* Use Resources to Support You:
* Try Christian meditation apps like Abide or Dwell or Lectio365 for guided Selah moments.
* Explore tools like brain.fm or Calm to help regulate brainwaves.
Daniel’s journey teaches us that Selah isn’t just about stillness—it’s about living intentionally and aligning with God’s design.
Questions to Ask Yourself (Review)
* What Went Well Today?
* Did you take moments of Selah? How did it make you feel?
* What improvements did you notice in your focus, mood, or relationships?
* What Needs Adjustment?
* What held you back from practicing Selah today?
* What can you do differently tomorrow to create space for it?
* Am I Aligning with God’s Purpose?
* How is Selah helping me lean into God’s promises and guidance?
* What specific ways can I reflect Christ’s peace and presence to those around me?
The practice of reviewing your progress, just as Daniel did, keeps you accountable and helps you refine your habits over time.
Suggestions for Sharing
Selah isn’t just for you. When you find peace and purpose, you’re called to share it with others. Here’s how:
* Model Selah in Your Leadership:
* Start meetings with a moment of pause. Encourage your team to reflect and breathe. You’ll be astounded with how much more productive your meetings will be.
* Share how practicing Selah has transformed your focus and mental health.
* Be a Mentor:
* Look for someone like Mark in the story—a colleague, friend, or family member who’s struggling with stress or burnout. Share your journey with them, along with practical steps to begin.
* Teach them simple habits like gratitude journaling or a morning reflection.
* Invite Others Into Selah:
* Organise small groups focused on scripture-based mindfulness and prayer. Use Selah as a guiding principle to build deeper spiritual connections.
* As Philippians 4:6–7 says: “Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God… will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.”
Final Thought
Selah is more than a pause—it’s a way of realigning your mind, heart, and purpose with God. Like Daniel, you can move from chaos to clarity, from exhaustion to renewal. Take the first step today. Start small, reflect deeply, and share boldly.
Because Selah isn’t just a practice. It’s a way of life.
Selah.
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