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I was driving across town the other day and I saw a sign hanging up that advertised a "Prescription Drug Drop-off Day.” It allowed residents to bring in old pills and bottles, no questions asked.
As much as I hate to admit this, my first thought was, “Oh my god, who’d give up their drugs for something like that?” It’s similar to how I first react when I see somebody at a restaurant get up to leave and there’s a half beer or mixed drink on the table. I’ve never done that in my entire life, even early on in my drinking days.
My second thought was even worse. It was a five-second contemplation of what a great robbery option it would have been back in the day to steal everything that got dropped off at a community drug drop-off day.
Again, I am not proud of my brain sometimes… but it’s the truth. I have the same addict brain sometimes when it comes to immediate reactions. An important thing that I’ve come to realize in recent years is that I need to accept that I am Pavlovian when it comes to seeing beer commercials and walking through a pharmacy—just like Pavlov’s dogs, my lizard brain associates alcohol and drugs with something I need to have. I’ve begun to just accept that that is my first thought and I am powerless over it. I am, however, responsible for the next thought.
And for that next thought, luckily my lizard brain has added on a sober brain that usually ends up with veto power over the addict part. And my sober brain kicked into gear with some more productive thoughts. Such as:
—That’s awesome that we have options for people to safely drop off their prescription drugs, no questions asked!
—Maybe, just maybe, if every town has these, one or two addicts out there won’t overdose because of a bunch of stray prescription drugs in somebody’s medicine cabinet.
—And last but not least… I am so glad I don’t have to actually plan out prescription drug drop-off day heists any more. I never did anything like that during my active addiction days… but I can’t say I never would have. I often hear stories about people who have an opiate addiction and eventually turn toward heroin because it can sometimes be cheaper than opiates, and I have no choice but to nod my head and think, “I never did that, but it is a ‘yet’ for me because I could totally have seen myself eventually going that way.”
Same with robbing people or places to sustain my drinking and drugging problem. I didn’t actually do it while I was active. But was I capable of it? Well, I had about a thousand things I said I would never do… then I did them. So I am not going to lie and say I could have never driven off with the town’s prescription drug drop-off truck or whatever they use.
I don’t have any prescription drugs to drop off, and I don’t really want to. So I am going to stay far the hell away from prescription drug drop-off day, even while applauding that it exists.
This newsletter is a place of joy and laughter about the deadly serious business of sobriety. So, as I will often do, let me close with a joke:
I was invited to a fight the other night, and an AA business meeting broke out.
(Credit: AA Grapevine, Feb. 2000, Michael S. from Massachusetts)
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