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I stayed at a hotel recently, and I really liked the towels and the lotion bottle in my room. I loved how firm the texture of the towels was, and the lotion was great for my dry face—not too oily, just oily enough. As I packed up to leave, I put one towel and a small bottle of lotion in my bag and zipped it up.
Then I unzipped it.
Taking stuff from hotels is not a new thing. In fact, it’s a cliche—from the beginning of time, back when cavemen stayed at Holiday Inn Express’ in Columbus, Ohio, they always took towels, I think. (You might want to fact-check me on that.)
The thought is, I paid $100 for the room from this giant corporation, so what’s the harm in taking a towel? I’m not here to litigate whether that’s right or wrong. I get it. That’s why I zipped it up in my bag initially, and I have taken stuff from hotels many times in the past.
It’s just not for me any more. I have figured out the best way for me to avoid doing 10 bad things is to not do 1 to begin with. I am a binger. I binged drugs and alcohol back in the day. And I binge food, TV shows and a bunch of other stuff to this day. The same as it was with drinking, the best way to avoid eating three donuts is to not eat the first one.
Stealing is a slippery slope for me. When I was active, I took whatever I thought I needed, without much remorse. I never got into going to Target and taking stuff… but I would have. For sure, I would have at some point. It was one of those lines I drew in my head that didn’t have much logic behind it. Why was stealing from my dad okay but not from Walmart? It was an addict’s rationale.
In sobriety, that rationale can still be a problem. Just like when I was drinking, the booze was a symptom of a bigger disease, not the disease itself. My disease has always required a spiritual solution that impacts every corner of my life.
When I say the rationale can be an issue, I mean that I have had a few times when I went through the self-checkout lane at the grocery store and something didn’t scan right. Every time I have gotten to the car and realized that, my first thought has been, “Well, I’ve probably overpaid for something in the past, so it probably evens out. Besides, their prices are ridiculous compared with some of the other grocery stories in the area. They could afford to have somebody like me forget to pay for a bag of chips once in awhile.”
Those thoughts just fly right into my brain. It’s an old muscle that I don’t work much any more, but it is a muscle that will get stronger if I work it out on a regular basis. I can’t do that. I can’t get started on one or two shady things, because for someone like me, one or two quickly can become three or four, and then look out, you better hide your wallet and those fancy plates that Aunt Vivian willed to you when she died.
It reminds me a little bit of an idea I entertained early in sobriety. I told a friend who isn’t an alcoholic that I had to quit drinking but would miss having a beer or two on NFL Sundays. His suggestion was to maybe allow myself every Sunday to drink a few non-alcoholic beers. I thought about it, but when I ran it by people I had met in sobriety, they all shook their heads that they thought it was a bad idea. It was explained to me that the rituals of drinking had to go along with the actual drinking. They suggested it was all or nothing on beer, and I tried nothing and it has worked.
I’d like to keep it that way. And I’d like to keep it that way on taking stuff. So I think I will just leave the lotion and towels in my hotel rooms. The hotel chain might be able to afford it. But I sure can’t.
This newsletter is a place of joy and laughter about the deadly serious business of sobriety. So, as I will often do, let me close with a joke:
"I think I woke up on the wrong side of my head this morning."
(Credit: AA Grapevine, January 2007, by Sarah S. of Harrisburg, Pa.)
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