Spirit has me on a tour of the US right now. No time for fun, stripper poles or frolicking in the sunshine. Every few days to a week I get a new message about where to go next. Then, I just pack my bags and head out.
Fully surrendered into the cosmic guidance I literally can't see but totally trust. Sometimes being in flow state looks like signing up for an Expo show offering whatever tools, gifts or resources I have and other days it's visiting churches in a new state to see how they're treating their local houseless population.
Most of the time, the churches have decided that their charitable acts should remain behind closed doors. Apparently, help only comes when you decide to sit on their pews or pray while donating money to their chosen renovations, despite the droves of people walking the streets like zombies because of the fentanyl epidemic.
Most of them are barely able to tell the difference between reality and an illusion. Playing out movies in the streets as if they're there, only to seconds later to be flopping on the ground and walked over by groups of passerby's. Our country is a mess and I wish I had more resources to help.
I met a few people on the reality TV show that I did that work in the non-profit space and own big rigs. I could really use their help right now but in due time.
Today, I landed myself in southern California at an Expo circuit giving healings and readings for an accessible price. My prices sometimes vary depending on God's guidance and what I'll need for my next trip or move. The money always comes but you definitely have to get used to having what you need, not what the world tells you, you need.
I'm literally living a Supernatural Winchester Brother comic book type of life. I didn't see it coming even after the show would pop up for an entire week beforehand.
On this particular day, I was sitting at a small round table in the center of the room. A femme who was known for her mediumship came over to my table and asked if they could adjust my setup. When I looked at her energy, it wasn't her. It was an ancestor who was here to help me. Sometimes they pick the people who can be more easily swayed or possessed to get messages to you. She was already a channel, so it made sense. Normally I don't let anyone touch my stuff but I felt safe.
The ancestor was old, they spoke slowly but firmly as if they were there to teach me an important lesson. They clearly had been a reader in their time as well. I listened intently as she shifted my table around, moved my decks and told me exactly how to sit. Then she placed my arms in a certain way and said that if I felt tense at any time I could do this arm movement. I was laughing because it looked so bizarre. In those moments, it's as if the ancestors enchanted people around you to not be able to see exactly what they're doing. The angels I've noticed do the same.
At the end of her demonstration, she leaned in closely to my face and said,
"Look at me honey, I need you to hear me right now okay?"
"Okay." I said slightly terrified. Their energy shifted as if I was talking to a very stern mother.
"You can't be afraid anymore. No more hiding who you are or your gifts. These people need you. You have to learn to toughen up and be fierce. Call on the strength within you, I know you know you have it!"
I started crying.
"You don't have to worry, you're going to be okay but you have to try. Keep trying and keep going. No more of this weakness, it ends now. Do you understand me?" They stared straight into my eyes and it looked like a long shadowy hallway. I couldn't see them but I could feel them in there. This person was like a shell, I wondered if she would remember unlike the others.
Some spiritual teachers tell you to not look into people's eyes and you should't but this time I needed to. They knew I needed to, so I could accept whatever path I was about to step into. I didn't know what, but in that moment my entire life changed.
"Yes." I said in agreement. Signed and ready.
Not so long after that, I met a another femme, a goddess who gifted me another message and with time, my fear began to disappear and a new reality unfolded.
From here on out, I would experience the hardest rights of passage in the spiritual realm I have ever witnessed. It wasn't an awakening, I was already awake. It was many years of journeying through the shadow realm advancing my gifts and removing any semblance of what I thought was possible so I could teach others. In order to bring people to the light, you have to guide them out of the darkness. Only shadow workers like myself can do that because we've put the pieces of the map together.
To celebrate this new path, I met a satanic leech 10 minutes later and I didn't even know.
Lessons come in many forms. In this case, he was rugged looking man all dressed in black doing readings closer to the entrance. A late sign up. I kept being drawn to his table and I didn't know why. I never went over and eventually he came to mine and sat down.
All he said was "Can I have a reading?"
I said yes, told him the price and he sent the money through Venmo.
"I don't know why but I feel really called to talk to you."
He kind of mumbled when he spoke and avoided eye contact. Eventually, he got comfortable and looked at me. He had solid black eyes. A tattoo that some people like to get to express their individuality or so I've been told. I could still see that the center of his eyes were hazel. He was covered in tattoos on his body too. All symbols I had recently seen. Someone I'm supposed to meet.
After the reading, we started talking about spirituality and his life on the road. We really hit it off. At first the eye thing kind of creeped me out not gonna lie but eventually you get used to them. I try not to be judgmental about people's way of expression.
Turned out we were both headed in the same direction towards the east coast. A long drive but he was nomadic as well, being led by Spirit. We decided to meet up in-between our stops at shows to get to know each other. In his car he had a chest similar to mine with a bunch of Egyptian hieroglyphs on them and had a bag that was filled with toys and knick knacks for his daughter back home.
Tiny pink sandals, a bear, bracelets and a few other things. He had shared custody and was out building his spiritual business while she stayed with her mother.
We both had a deep appreciation for music especially system of down and bands that kind of sounded similar. He was giving me, healing my inner teen vibes. He was edgy, wore combat boots, black jeans and a jacket. The weather was still cool and I was wearing my boots too except I looked like a sparkly rainbow exploded on me - my preferred way of dressing. We were opposites in many ways but also similar.
Eventually things started to get more intimate and I learned he was into BDSM. Then it all started to make sense. He was living in the embodiment of his deepest and darkest desires. Something I hadn't fully been able to stretch my wings into but was always curious. One of my other partners was also into BDSM but was a little shy.
He was not shy at all and made that very clear.
Sending me midday videos pleasuring himself and setting times to discuss the details of what would soon be our rules of engagement...and might I say, he was very well equipped. A natural actually. A few terms of the agreement, testing, limited interaction with other people and a pain the a$% tax.
Which basically stated, I would have to pay if I ever became a pain in the a$#. I don't always keep my mouth shut so there was that. I made some adjustments as well.
"I'm not calling you a f&%$ing master, I'm black you idiot." I'm a really classy lady and racking up my pain in the a$% tax already.
He was fine with it. The next time I went to the local sex stores I noticed lots of collars and chains that said "master" on them. Of course this is a thing. Ugh.
A friend I had at the time started to get quite nasty and jealous about my relationship with him. She was a virgin in her 30's. He was attentive to me, quick to respond and always kept me satisfied.
As I stepped into the elevator I noticed that my grey sweat pants had the largest wet spot on them. I've never felt this turned on in my entire life. Forcing myself to work, sleep and eat. Normal tasks but with him I could barely function and could feel his energy everywhere I went. He liked to call me bb, short for babe. Every time I saw a message from him I would spiral into sweaty sex fantasies getting lost in his grip.
He had sent me a video while he was on the road of a man dressed in black with a woman they had met. A music video with the story line of the woman bringing life back into his dark soul. It was very emo but cute. His way of telling me how he felt.
Everything was going as well as it could be until he started to open up about his satanic practices literally and his baby mama drama.
When he was upset he tried to take it out on me and I stood my ground. Sternly pointing out that he was trying to use BDSM as a way to not doing his healing work. He unleashed a lot of fury after that. Didn't talk to me for weeks and then randomly popped up calling me bb. I immediately ended it and wished him well. He started sending me lots of dark spell work but at his core he was a little baby bitch witch and none of them hit.
To this day, he stalks me but I always know when he's coming. A great experience but I don't think I'll be dating anyone with the black eye tattoos again.
🔥 Fact or Fiction?
Sooo My Beauties✨
Was he real? A tattooed-eyed Dom sending contracts and chaos my way? Or was it all a shadow-soaked fever dream? 🌑
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🃏 Tarot Card
Card: The Devil (XV)
* Upright: Desire, temptation, erotic contracts, lust in chains.
* Reversed: Breaking free, calling out manipulation, shadow-work initiation.
